Careful, May Bite!

Don’t put your fingers in the snap-dragons

Laughs Alice, they may bite!

I am not sure what snap-dragons are

But I place my hands in my pockets just in case 

We are taking a stroll around the garden

At least in our minds

For it is night and we are half dreaming

Poring over illustrated books

Letting our finger tips graze the coloured plates

They are old books, bound in leather

With thick vellum pages

The writing is smooth and worn, well loved

We miss the physicality of books

Their weight, the sense of others having been there before

Outside the wind moans 

And the rain cries down the window panes

We light candles and turn on the lights

All the better for reading our adventures

We like the rhythmic swaying of the tree branches

The sound of the leaves tapping against the walls

It is as if both the outside world 

And our inner world are alive

We take a moment of quiet 

Lost in our own dreamings

I think of all the demons who have tried to bite me

How they sunk their teeth in and wouldn’t let hold

I have more weapons now

To bat them away 

I remember the pain - on my flesh and in my bones

Lingering long after the shock 

I wasn’t fearful then, now I am 

I want my thoughts to be soft and smooth

As if spun like candy-floss 

I watch the candle flames flicker

Think about snap-dragons and thorns 

Rub absently at my pocketed-fingers 

There are no cuts or ridges

Just old familiar scars

Softening with the passing time. 

Feast

Shall we take tea, asks Alice

I think that would be delightful I reply

We pull the curtains

Light the candles 

Put the kettle on to boil 

I like these silent moments

When we have the space to be

We will eat toast and jam 

With dripping butter 

And triangle slices

Crunch like a bursting flower

Silently enjoy the flavour

Raspberry, tart and sweet on our tongue

Alice licks her lips and fingers

Happily swinging her legs

I think of cold mornings

Warmed by milky tea

Thick porridge and honey

Then a supper of muffins and hot chocolate

It is good, to enjoy our food

Like more than surviving 

A small pleasure we will always enjoy 

The scent of bergamot and lavender fills the room 

Night falls, I hope we will dream 

Our bellies full and warmed 

Sweet wanderings and vibrant colours

We enjoy our daily feast

Take pleasure in being with each other

Content with all that is spread on our table

How lucky she says

And I agree.

Dizzy

A lot of chatter makes me dizzy

Like having stars thrown 

At my nerves and muscles

An uncomfortable electricity

A force which does not come from within 

It rattles me, makes me nervous

As if I am marooned on a planet

A world not designed for me 

It makes me feel vulnerable, lost

It seems people are stuck in a perpetual loop

Of noise and gestures

Useless conversation

All of which seem unnecessary to me

Nobody seems to look in my eyes

And see that they are too much

That I would like the gift of silence 

A simple exchange of careful words and thought

Like I have with Alice

Where we do not need too much

Just steady lines of ink

Written on beautiful paper 

Churned out as effortlessly 

As water through a mill, slipping through the stone wheel

Soft as a crawling baby and just as curious 

I look at my hand

It shakes

I would like to be an ocean away from all this distraction 

Cocooned in my own head 

Safely tucked away

Sometimes these dizzy spells 

Hit me like a wave

As if all sense has flipped over

Things shine too brightly and hurt

I close my eyes, shut the curtains

Wait for the spinning to subside 

Which of course it must always do -

One cannot stay dizzy forever.

For Shay’s Word Garden

Opposites

Perhaps you are the sun 

And I am the moon 

She claps her hands in glee

Both are light and delicious 

In their own way 

One like a cool opal stone

One as warm as butter

Looking at both makes me happy 

I like both cloud gazing

And star gazing

It is good to see and feel the world again

For a moment I stop and think

Watching her face

Relaxed and happy 

I see myself in her now

The tides of our adventure have quietened 

We are now on the riverbank perhaps 

Enjoying a picnic

On a bee-drowsy day 

Summer long forgotten

In the falling leaves of autumn 

Sweet strawberries and thick, delicious cream 

We look up, smile at each other

Full and warm 

We both have blue eyes 

Like the sea

Now both mine and hers shine

No longer afflicted by powders 

Or potions 

Of that I am glad

And I think she is too

The world is far easier to navigate 

When your senses are clear

Perhaps in time we will bake bread

And brew fresh tea

Bring to life the old, red teapot

But moving forwards is a step by step process

I need to be careful of moss and broken stones

I enjoy my twilight moments

When both moon and sun can co-exist

When we can be together

Hand in hand

Thought in thought

Being in being

Two opposites in one beautiful whole. 

Flowers

In the summer I will weave

Flowers in your hair

Sunshine brushed buttercups

And cotton white daisies

A soft wave of colour

To highlight your tranquil blue eyes

For now the leaves have fallen

A russet brown carpet under my feet

The air is cool and I enjoy looking out the window

Wrapped up in blankets

Hot chocolate in my hands

I breathe deeply 

Slowly watch the world unfold before me

Like a magic trick which always astounds me

She sings

I smile secretly 

I look at pictures of blossoms in books

Remember drawing them as a child 

Hands and fingers as small as yours

I remember the sleeping dormouse

At the bottom of a tree

Not like your dormouse

Trapped in a teapot for all of the story

Mine was sleeping peacefully 

Nestled up in bark and moss

I try to remember what it was like to be small 

It seems both an eternity and a lightening flash ago

Perhaps I can recapture the feelings of discovery and wonder 

The roses I bought home did not thrive

But I like that I tried

That I took comfort in my home 

It is enough to dream of wild flowers

Waiting to be plucked 

Though not too many 

And with careful fingers

How wonderful it is 

To look forward 

To embrace the world and all its little magicks. 

Garden

I would like to take a walk in the gardens

Past the brambles and the hawthorn trees

I would gather berries and put them in my pocket 

I love the way they are coloured 

And gleam like winter treasures 

Hiding under a layer of fallen leaves 

Little totems of light and hope 

Something to seek out and enjoy

Perhaps I will bump into Alice on my adventure

It would be expected 

We have grown closer as we have become older

But also more able to be apart

Connected but independent 

Her fingers may be tinted with ink from the inkwell

Perhaps she has been drawing or writing

I like to think she is happy here too 

The expression on her face is one of contentment

So I cannot be wrong in assuming she feels safe too 

The gardens lie beyond my front door

Away from the window 

One day perhaps I will live in a house with a garden

It is always nice to dream 

I would like peace in my dotage 

Light and nature and peaceful dreams 

As it is I have the magic of daydreaming 

Walking light as a feather in my thoughts

I look forward to the day when my feet touch the earth

When my hair is ruffled by the breeze

And each breath is accompanied by the smell of 

Pine needles and apples 

I take comfort in the angles of every garden I create

Little flashlights or markers

Urging me ever forward, lighting my way. 

For Shay's Word Garden