Wednesday, 30 December 2015

Dawn





















The white birds fall silently
In the morning dark sky

Like milk
Poured in the sweetest tea

Wake up
Wake up 
Are you there

The sheets are a jumble
For one sweet moment 
You are here

If we ever wake
There is
Nothing 
Here
But 
Me 

Same old daydream
Your voice swirling
Beating wings
She sings
Eating glue mixed with jello
At the sink

In the tarnish is
My stone face
My brick wall heart

Empty investments
Time
Money
Death 
Nothing new
She says

Maybe we will never hold each other again

Wake up
Wake up 
Are you there

Shouts Alice

Yes
Always 
My
Love

She combs her hair
Pulls her socks
Her eyes are blue
Like the sea
Like you

I let her play quietly 
In the pages
And the words

Left alone
She is resolute
Free

I do believe we will find an end
She says 
Fresh as a dawn daisy
I smile

I turned you away for a penny 
And a dream

Who would you want to see

You

Friends never made
The person I could not be

Shut your eyes
She says
Pressing a cherry stained hand to my brow 

What do you see

Nothing

Silly
When you shut your eyes
You can see anything

She goes back to her work
And sings

The white birds fall silently
In the morning dark sky

Like milk
Poured in the sweetest tea.


Sunday, 27 December 2015

Bough





















I wait for the call
The fall
The unbearable loss of being

Hasn’t that happened already
She whispers
Everything is cherry stained
Dirty

Sick and tired
Cherry pies and flies

There you go blooms Alice
She is wearing woodland flowers

Crash
Fall
Stall 
Brick
Wall

We have to begin again
Quick sticks
Spring through 
Thick snow
Slow breaths
Hung low

Deep sleep
Keep safe

The trees bough 
Reach my knees
So very tired

Impossible chill
Sticks like butter
Curled on the floor
In the night

I made the deal 
Years ago
Bullet proof
Skin tight
Complete
No joins
No room 
For what comes next
It connects every inch of me
To this sentence

I will never get out
No matter how hard I try

It comes out loud

She wipes my lips
Not astonished or proud

I guess that is why she is here

There is no one else to tell

Seventy years
I think
I would hope for less
She says
Past a hundred 
There is nothing much left to wander

The cold water 
Takes me to the field
The one with the silver stream
Where chocolate powder hangs from trees
And dreams go on forever
She giggles

She lies on the floor 
Holds my hand
That’s a nice thought
We say together

We wait for the call
The fall
The unbearable loss of being.


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Apologies if we can't get back to your posts and replies - we are all at sea - says Alice :~ 





Saturday, 19 December 2015

Decorate






















They clip the rooster's wings 
In the car park
Is that an anachronism or anomaly
Hmm
Both maybe

She swings her legs
Drinks the sweet sweet 
Her socks have changed
From white to brown

Too many years on the shelf
We think together
Sins burnt
Like bad paint 
Into the creases of our skin

I think we should go down 
Collect his feathers
Keep them safe
Perhaps one day he will need them
To spread his wings and fly away

She is a kind girl
Underneath 
My little unmarked friend

My chest bursts
Lungs rattle 
Like fists pounding 
On the cage door of my ribs

I don't trouble her
I don’t trouble anyone

Wrapped up viciously in the afternoon sun
Catching consonants through the window
As if words can help me 
Out
Out

I find it hard now
Down 
Stream 
Line
Born
Die
Raid the pantry 
Scheme 
For sugar and pies

Fear lures me 

In
Inn
Sing

You liked the donkey and the palm fronds

She is busy 
I can tell 
But she smiles
Her bestest smile from the top shelf 

I wonder why she sits up there

Because I am your rooster she giggles
Although you never clipped my wings

Thank you 
She says
Jumping down
Besides you put me there
Remember
I touch my face
Trying to

If one fact creeps in
My head will flood

What you do is really quite mad
Madder than hatter
She squeals

A wonderland past extreme

The trees live in the windows
Your failing smile
Dropping like leaves

The light bulb swings
There is peace in the ticking

I let her out to play

She wraps tinsel in the alley
It won't take the smell of piss away
I know
But a girl must always try to make pretty

Didn’t your mummy teach you that

My mummy taught me

Run
Hide 
Warn

Then we will be here forever

The cock crows half past crazy
We look at each other and laugh.

Wednesday, 16 December 2015

Out





















We write help in invisible stars
No one will see
Until the lights go out

You are quite the little apocalypse today aren’t you

Be prepared
I learnt that
Pin and paper
In my pocket
A shiny penny
Just in case

The world can be vengeful you know

We live in a blank garage
With a red dividing line

Boom boom boom
Faster than a rocket

Off we trip to Kansas
That’s funny 
It sounds the same
She giggles 

Do you think I leave anything to chance
Welcome to my savage design

We can huff and puff until we lose our mind
Fuck 
It's lost already
She lights a cigarette
Lies back against the pillows
Arm behind her head

Ten years disappear in one inhalation
All the tension drained
Like blood
From her stomach

You are quite the little immortal today aren’t you

Always
She says
Poking out her tongue

The town dies in black and white
The burning sun left years ago

I don't want to buy a skyscraper
But I wouldn't mind a castle
She mumbles through the cigarette
Hanging off the corner of her lip

It’s all just the shutdown of electrical activity in your brain
I’ve seen it many times before

Time ticks on the fluoxetine clock

I always thought we were troubled in a light and carefree way

Like pixie dust
She laughs

Exactly

Dematerialise
Diminish
Dismantle
Disconnect

Maybe I would like to wear a dress

Star
Syrup 
Sugar
Loss

Just why are we eating an orange
At the kitchen sink

I don't know
I don’t remember anything 

We look at each other and laugh
Fall through the bed
Write love in invisible stars
No one will see
Not until the lights go out.


Saturday, 12 December 2015

Sour























I fill the escape bags with dirt
No wonder you can't run 
She admonishes
From the top shelf
You won't be happy 
Until we are all stuck here 

Like little spiders 
Stuck stuck sticky 
In the sugar jar

Shh
I have to stay quiet
So nobody knows

Trust me
Everybody knows

Say cheese
Her finger mimics a
Camera
Click
Trick
Click

Sometimes it feels like my voice is blind
The thread
The web
A noose 
Around my head

Gravel in my throat
Nightmares in my knees 

She hums
Like the sun
An empty drum

Hardly an aubade
But I love you anyway
She blows a sticky kiss

I curl up
Wondering if molestation
Ever leaves

I grant you a pardon
Long may it be a royal one she giggles
I don't like the sword on my neck

I have to get out
Leave the house

She spins and twirls

This is not Alice
It is somebody else
A real person
A person I feel
But don’t remember

They were 
Powerful
Inside
Impotent
Out

Get out 
Get out 
Whoever you are

If you insist she inhales

Maybe our lungs will burst
Like birthday balloons
She claps 

She is back

Last straw
Crawling on the floor

A bedrock of Jurassic limestone
Everything preserved
Like moonlight in amber

Mass grave 
Dog tooth
Only bones left to chew

Look at yourself 
Look at yourself
This is who you are

Do your sorries
Say your good byes 

I am cold
Learn to cry quietly 
You fool

The milk is sour
Past its expiration
It calmly crawls back up
Until everything is empty

Inside
Out

My hand searches 
Rests on the escape bag

Think your way out
She sings
It’s easy as pie
See