Red

I stand in the kitchen

With my eyes

Shut

In my place

But not

In my place

I have run out of soldier's blood

It drips

Red

To the end

Of my finger

Tips

I clean

Up

Up

I clean

To reclaim

What is

Loss

Empty

Powder

Dust

Mine

Stomach blown

Eyes

Full

drip drip drip

Possibility

Bed

No phone

End of sheet

Red

Possibility

I keep one week

One week of red

Not to stand up

Up

To

You

But quietly

Shh

For me

I write our prayer in pencil

For you

Dry

Run out

Red

Like

Old blood

Strong blood

Soldier blood

Our blood.                    

Comfort

The bells bend

On the back of the wind

Outside the supermarket

Queue

I change my feet

My heart

Bends

I would rather lean

With the birds

And the dead sheep

Its head broken

On the back of the tree

The bird can not land

Stuck in flight

Wings bent

I did not make the flight

stuck stuck sticky

To the metal rail

To the bridge

To the wind

Wind so strong

Nothing can take off

Or land

I change my feet

The horrible man shakes his head at me

Like I am bad

I know I am bad

My heart

Bends

I prefer time in numbers

Not

In hand

stuck stuck sticky

I meet St Peter

Behind the supermarket

He holds my hand

As the water

Fills my bed. 

Buried

There is powder

Buried in the bed

It keeps me safe

It keeps

Me

Softly

Buried

Under

I see the hill

I ran

Down

Trippedy Trip

Slip

Fall

It would be so easy

To get

It

Right

Like the wind on the bridge

I pass over

Water

Thick as butter

Heavy as breath

A hardship

To out run

To run out

The thoughts

Are in the same place

Up the hill

Struggling

On the tide

Buried in the bed

I do not need the sound to hear it

I do not need the words to feel it

Every electric

Pulse

Echoes

From brain to finger

Tip

There is powder buried in the bed

It keeps me safe

It keeps

Me

Softly

Buried

Under.

Warning

It must have been a rough night

The dead bird is on the floor

Again

Trip

Bang

Warning

Dangerous

Drop

The only thing

Dropped

Is

My

Face

Hurts

As it falls

On the carpet

Take a look

At the sun

It will be done

Soon

Packed up

Fedexed

With the last traces of rainbow

Dust

I am still going

A railing not quite strong enough

To

Stop

Me

Feeling

Sick

We were told to close our eyes

But we saw

We

Saw

Everything

A vapour trail of

Heat

I will wear my necrotic crown

Like an asbestos container

It must have been a rough night

The dead bird is on the floor

Again.

Drop

We eat orange and lemon

Drops

Let the sugar dissolve

On our tongue

As if it is

Lavish

My face

Aches

Like

A

Dead

Weight

Dangling

On cord

From the post

We see

When we walk

On the iced path

Watch out

Watch out

Cross the road

With your eyes closed

We would like to

Drop

Drops

But we don’t want to fall

It has to be right

Like

Sugar

Like

Orange and lemon

Drops

Rich

Delicious

We eat sweets

Like powder

Hide in our pockets

Sit on the wall

We are so past normal

We are just that

Nothing to see

Move on

If only the world would stop

And see us

Wrapped in our

Orange and lemon

Drops.

Watch

Who are you

He asks

Takes a drag of his cigarette

We think of names

Tried on

Used

Abandoned

This is Alice

I stumble

And I

I am not sure who I am

He smokes

We can not move

Perhaps we will wait for him to tell us

Who

We

Are

The hand print stains the wall

The hand print stains my face

Thud

That is who I am

But there is no word for that

No name

We hit the ground

Small footsteps

Fast

Up the hill

To nowhere

We can not breathe

By the time we reach the bench

As if we have swallowed down all his smoke

And we have

We have

We shake our head

I can not change the time

They have set

Twist it up

Like chaos

It will tick tick away

Until I am gone

Until there are no more questions

I can not answer

We shake our head

Alice, I whisper

Even

When he is gone

When you are gone

When I am gone

There will be no name

For who I am

For what I am

The tears drop to my boots

Her tiny fingers brush them away

She kisses my brow

You do not need a name, she whispers

You are you

All that I need

All that I am. 

Buttons and Bows

I swallow buttons and bows

To make myself pretty

You know

The mirror broke

Wore away

Like his face

Her feet

On cold stones

Bare

Like a harvest

She wraps the new glass

In brown paper

I don’t want to undo it

Unwrap what she gave me

Look up

There are colours in the sky

Fluid as the turn of the helicopter

Blades

The cloud

Sat plump on the water

The supermarket crashed

Thud

The sound of the glass

Dropping

The sound of the blade

Dropping

The sound of the penny

Dropping

You’ll be alright in a minute

You know I won’t

Forever more shall be

Conquer your hunger

It says

On the telephone box

As if it knows the battle

Of me

Walking by

Buttons and bows

Will not suffice

I think

And so I turn to powder and pins.