Wednesday, 8 January 2014

Unstuck

The cleaners are coming
Rabbit lost a leg
Gnawed it off
When the trap fell
Cheshire Cat
Smells like gin
We all fall
Down
They emptied his post box
Wiped the boot marks off the wall
Cleared the empty packets
The cans
From the side
Like rubbing out his story
You are gone now
Glue creates electricity
When pulled
We stuck stuck stickied
Fell through the floor together
Isolated in our descent
Faithful in our descent
Clinging to something
That thing without a name
Know know knowing
The trip
And fall
Maybe rabbit chewed his leg off to stop himself falling
Whispers Alice
Some lies are best not scrutinized
She lays them out as a bed to fall on
We sit quietly in the hallway
Listening to the wires and brushes
What did he leave behind
Unpaid bills
Special offers
Last year’s paper
What did he leave behind
Us we whisper
Us
We sit quietly in the hall
Waiting for the next
White rabbit
There will always be another
For that we can be sure.





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50 comments:

  1. Ramesh Sood8 January 2014 at 04:24

    This one line gives me the message loud and clear....for a happier life..

    "Some lies are best not scrutinized".. they need to remain the way they are and let them perish with time..

    Thank You Jae..

    RS:)

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    1. Jae Rose8 January 2014 at 06:16

      We hope for just that..thank you very much Ramesh :)

      Delete
  2. humbird8 January 2014 at 05:14

    'Some lies are best not scrutinized
    She lays them out as a bed to fall on' ~ soft approach
    and waiting for another chance, 'next white rabbit' ~ important to be open.

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    1. Jae Rose8 January 2014 at 06:17

      We hope the next White Rabbit is calm and quiet..thank you humbird..

      Delete
  3. Anonymous8 January 2014 at 05:49

    So true that there's always another White Rabbit! Great poem.

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    1. Jae Rose8 January 2014 at 06:17

      Yes..that can be either good or bad..but keeps you on your toes..thank you miskmask..

      Delete
  4. Laurie Kolp8 January 2014 at 06:37

    Clinging to something
    That thing without a name

    ...yes, there is always hope!

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  5. Mary8 January 2014 at 06:50

    We all need to cling to something, I think....even if the thing is nameless. All need a safety net. And indeed, I also agree that some lies just can't be scrutinized. Sometimes it's best not to over-analyze.

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    1. Jae Rose8 January 2014 at 08:55

      A day without over-analyzing would be a wonderful picnic..maybe soon..I think we do need something to cling to..breaks the fall..thank you Mary

      Delete
  6. rallentanda8 January 2014 at 06:51

    Oh dear a cheshire cat with a gin problem...well at least he is still around and did not take off like the rabbit. Stick with cats...get pussy off the booze. I used to have a cat called Albert who use to steal washing from other peoples houses and bring it home...it has just occured to me that he may have had a gin problem as well:)...true story!

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    1. Jae Rose8 January 2014 at 08:57

      Washing powder! Dear Albert had a different kind of powder problem..don't worry we give Cheshire Cat a (very) wide birth..thank you Rallentanda

      Delete
  7. Ann (bunnygirl)8 January 2014 at 06:59

    Clinging is often the source of our troubles, and there is always another rabbit. Best not to cling or follow, if one can help it.

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    1. Jae Rose8 January 2014 at 08:59

      It would be good not to follow any dubious rabbit I suppose..the real kind I would follow all the way though..thank you Ann

      Delete
  8. Susan8 January 2014 at 07:42

    Brilliant! This poem took me so many places: to the sudden empty bed at a nursing home, to a vacated apartment, to the paths of a forest, and to my two childhoods--the real one and the late 1960s in college--to the death of my grandmother and back here where I clean out the old traps and cushion my falls in a wonderland of new and positive self images. I am left behind, I am lucky and sad. I feel for those little ones in the hall witnessing the rub-out and knowing vaguely that new will enter and they will thrive. Of course, this is way over the Poets United' 75 word limit, but I can not complain. I love this poem.

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    1. Jae Rose8 January 2014 at 09:01

      Phew! That is a journey..I am glad we intersected on the way..thank you Susan..and apologies..we are not so good at reading or following instructions..I think I read 75 lines..which of course is TS Eliot territory..and entirely illogical..next time we will pay more attention

      Delete
    2. Susan8 January 2014 at 16:18

      White rabbits keep trying logic in a surreal world. I'm glad we intersected as well. Grin.

      Delete
    3. Jae Rose9 January 2014 at 03:45

      :)

      Delete
  9. Sheilagh Lee8 January 2014 at 07:56

    Clinging to something
    That thing without a name you can go on survive and achieve happiness

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    1. Jae Rose8 January 2014 at 09:02

      Thank you Sheilagh..with a little luck and will power we hope to...

      Delete
  10. Sherry Blue Sky8 January 2014 at 09:42

    This is really brilliant, Jae Rose. I really felt this poem and especially loved "what did he leave? Us." Love the rabbit running through this poem on his gnawed off leg, too. Clinging to the thing without a name is brilliant, too. Loved this poem.

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    1. Jae Rose8 January 2014 at 10:10

      Thank you very much Sherry..very pleased you enjoyed..

      Delete
  11. alan17048 January 2014 at 10:38

    We sit quietly in the hall
    Waiting for the next

    Loved this- That expectation, the silent moment before we step into the future

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  12. Unknown8 January 2014 at 11:21

    Like the hope for another white rabbit. Another will come! This one will hopefully not have lies to scrutinize!

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    1. Jae Rose8 January 2014 at 11:22

      Yes a straight up rabbit would be nice for a change...thank you Robyn..

      Delete
  13. Gabriella8 January 2014 at 11:38

    Great poem, Jae! You certainly evoke Alice's world in a wonderful manner. Like a lot of other commenters my favorite line is "Some lies are best not scrutinized".

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    1. Jae Rose8 January 2014 at 12:48

      Thank you very much Gabriella..poor Alice..she deserves to be back home by now!

      Delete
  14. annell48 January 2014 at 11:43

    I like the energy of the poem...like life...sometimes maybe we don't like it so much...maybe it's OK...it happens...try to make heads or tails...there is a sadness about it all.

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    1. Jae Rose8 January 2014 at 12:50

      Yes Annell..even good minutes can seem a little sad..it all goes so quickly..whether we like it or not..still we must treasure the good things...and people..thank you x

      Delete
  15. Alice Audrey8 January 2014 at 12:03

    Yeah, there will always be another white rabbit. After all, they breed like rabbits.

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    1. Jae Rose8 January 2014 at 12:51

      True enough (other) Alice..on that we can rely too! Little blighters ;)

      Delete
  16. revelations8 January 2014 at 13:57

    had to read this a couple of times ... there are little nuggets in just about every line... great poem...

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  17. Old Egg8 January 2014 at 15:07

    Perhaps the next white rabbit will be tame. Let's hope so. You have an incredible knack at creating such intriguing writing from everyday events. One always hopes neighbours will be neighbourly sadly even white rabbits have their faults...and problems.

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    1. Jae Rose9 January 2014 at 03:51

      It's a good job everyday life is intriguing..I wonder if imagination has a place when your life is extraordinary..I guess even a nice house and a bit of fun money loses it's allure :~ thank you Old Egg no doubt the next white rabbit will take it's turn

      Delete
  18. kaykuala8 January 2014 at 16:50

    There will always be another
    For that we can be sure.

    A hope and an expectation are the ingredients most useful in most situations. It gives finality a back seat and offers answers. Wonderful write Jae!

    Hank

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    1. Jae Rose9 January 2014 at 03:53

      What a good way at looking at it...thank you Hank..

      Delete
  19. Karen9 January 2014 at 02:55

    The Alice/rabbit motif is wonderfully effective in this sad, sad tale.

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  20. J Cosmo Newbery9 January 2014 at 03:20

    Nicely done. The Cheshire Cat will never be the same for me again though.

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    1. Jae Rose9 January 2014 at 03:56

      Sorry to burst your bubble J Cosmo...but thank you too!

      Delete
  21. Maniparna9 January 2014 at 13:05

    Nice one.. The last two lines are wonderful ! There is always a space for hope and expectation..

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    1. Jae Rose10 January 2014 at 03:35

      Hopefully so..thank you very much Maniparna

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  22. Anonymous9 January 2014 at 15:04

    oh my... a whole new look to the rabbit hole.... excellent poem-story from beginning to end...

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    1. Jae Rose10 January 2014 at 03:36

      It is forever changing that rabbit hole! Thank you Ms Pie...

      Delete
  23. Anonymous9 January 2014 at 22:17

    Hey we was just reading your post on my HTC Phone and I was thinking about how well it will work on the new ipad thats coming out. Fleeting thought. Anyway thanks!
    Bocce Ball Game

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    1. Jae Rose10 January 2014 at 03:37

      Another new IPad..will have gadget envy now! Thank you Ammi

      Delete
  24. TCPC9 January 2014 at 23:47

    There is another white rabbit with another event, another story so much for us today, tomorrow and the days to follow. Beautiful!

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    1. Jae Rose10 January 2014 at 03:38

      A story a day..that's a good thought..thank you Akila

      Delete

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