Sunday, 12 January 2014

Impact

My feet are in the cobwebs
My head is in the stone
We tear out pictures
From the tumbleweed
To make a life
A dream
A home
We are the last ones left
After the impact
Remote
Stuck within ourselves
A pool of litter
Delivered by the storm
Lifeless
On the slab
Laid out bare
Our footprints are small
Too small to illuminate
The price we paid
Sometimes it haunts us
So we walk
Painting scenes
With cherry bombs
Lemonade
Vanilla drops
Drops
Penny
Down the well
No door to sweep away the dust
Coal in our hands
On our tongue
So thirsty
Nothing we need
Seems to be where we need it
And so we move
One step at a time
A circle is only a circle if you follow it around
States Alice
And so we move
My head shakes off the cobwebs
My feet kick off the stone.


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36 comments:

  1. Anonymous12 January 2014 at 02:57

    This reads like a list-form-poem. It just tumbles nicely along with its storyline.

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    1. Jae Rose12 January 2014 at 04:06

      Thank you miskmask..we like lists in wonderland!

      Delete
  2. Magical Mystical Teacher12 January 2014 at 03:17

    "after the impact" sounds as though Earth has been struck by a huge meteor.

    Like Alice, I'm thinking that circles are endless mind games! ;)

    Litter

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose12 January 2014 at 04:06

      Yes indeed - on both counts..thank you Magical :)

      Delete
  3. Unknown12 January 2014 at 04:01

    I loved how you turned those first 2 lines around in the end! One step at a time is the way to go!

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    1. Jae Rose12 January 2014 at 04:07

      Thank you Robyn..seems to be the most reliable way to go..

      Delete
  4. annell412 January 2014 at 05:45

    Yes, I like the way the piece comes full circle...cobwebs to stone...one step at a time.

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    1. Jae Rose12 January 2014 at 07:14

      Thank you very much Annell..like working your way through a painting!

      Delete
  5. Keith's Ramblings12 January 2014 at 06:25

    That Alice was no fool! A joy to read.

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  6. Marianne12 January 2014 at 06:25

    Love the juxtaposition of your first and last lines.

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  7. Ann (bunnygirl)12 January 2014 at 07:38

    Wise Alice! Just because one can go in a circle doesn't mean one has to, even if the path seems to lead that way. Real freedom means really choosing and not just following yet another rabbit trail.

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose12 January 2014 at 09:22

      Yes I think so..thank you Ann..I guess with freedom comes mistakes but better than being stuck..Alice can be a good guide

      Delete
  8. Anonymous12 January 2014 at 09:35

    I absolutely love this, especially:
    "We tear out pictures
    From the tumbleweed
    To make a life
    A dream
    A home"

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  9. Anonymous12 January 2014 at 12:01

    Circles are a symbol of wholeness, a life cycle completed. Alice is right. And your reader is rewarded by following your poetic circle from beginning to end. Really like this one Jae,

    Elizabeth

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    1. Jae Rose13 January 2014 at 09:09

      Thank you very much Elizabeth..your description made me think of some of the mandalas you have in your blog..if my memory serves me right!

      Delete
  10. Old Egg12 January 2014 at 14:07

    Like Bunnygirl I too was struck by Alice's wisdom regarding the circle. We are all survivors otherwise we could not write about it. We must use our time well as you use your words so well Jae as you lead us us from one theme to the next tantalizing us with cherry bombs and lemonade and that resolute determination in the last lines.

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose13 January 2014 at 09:11

      Thank you very much Old Egg..wisdom doesn't creep around here often so we thought we would scribble it down..after which we need a sweet treat ;)

      Delete
  11. humbird12 January 2014 at 18:31

    Vital and all up to act now! Love your positivity: 'My head shakes off the cobwebs
    My feet kick off the stone.'

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose13 January 2014 at 09:12

      Thank you humbird..like wisdom positivity doesn't grace our doorstep that much..glad we caught it as it did

      Delete
  12. Tammie12 January 2014 at 18:38

    This had really great "rhythm" to it as I read it. I loved it! Good to be back writing with you all!!! Or, scribbling...:)

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    1. Jae Rose13 January 2014 at 09:13

      Thank you Tammie..no matter if its writing or scribbling as long as the words come out!

      Delete
  13. Anonymous13 January 2014 at 13:27

    as a rolling stone... tumbling... amazing the power of a stone, a pebble, a boulder....

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  14. Anonymous13 January 2014 at 19:31

    You’re one talented chick, J – this is yet another beauty – in or out don’t matter – and the walking, the painting scenes with cherry bombs, lemonade, vanilla drops…it grabbed me so perfectly real and pleasantly

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose14 January 2014 at 07:55

      Dear Miss A thank you so very pleasantly x

      Delete
  15. Walt Wojtanik13 January 2014 at 20:53

    You've come full circle with this and it works wonderfully well, Jae Rose.

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  16. flaubert14 January 2014 at 01:27

    Wonderfully visual piece of writing, Jae. And that last couplet is something I am trying to do right now in my life.

    Pamela

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose14 January 2014 at 07:56

      It's tough isn't it..some days the cobwebs switch places with the stones..but as long as we keep moving it must help..just a little? Good luck too

      Delete
  17. Belva Rae Staples14 January 2014 at 15:45

    You've proven through your poetry that no one is doomed to travel in a circle unless they choose to. I love this.

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  18. kaykuala16 January 2014 at 06:14

    And so we move
    My head shakes off the cobwebs
    My feet kick off the stone.

    One sure way of making things to be moving! Nicely Jae!

    Hank

    ReplyDelete

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