Faces

Alice shows me a photograph

Look she says

It is like the ones he took of me

When I was in the garden

This girl is dressed in a white cotton dress

Her parents are in the reflection of the glass

I was left alone with him

She sighs

It is a sigh

Like the weight of the sickle 

I used to destroy my face 

We dream of staircases

Of falling down

It is quite possible we will 

Become beautiful

I laugh

You will I say

I will stary 

Hidden in the tree

My skin scarred and worn 

More a boy than a girl 

Your destiny is in your hands

She reads

Eventually I think

At first you have to survive

I think of the sad eyes

A young girl looking out

Onto a unknown land

One day we will escape

Our destiny 

I whisper

I pretend not to see

As a single tear drops

From her eyes onto

The black and white photograph

Of the little girl.

Alice Speaks

I worry so

When she closes her eyes

It is most curious

How all she wants 

To do is sleep

Life is full of adventures

But she is too preoccupied 

To find them

I fell asleep once

Under the tree by the river 

It was a most glorious feeling

But I woke up again

She never wakes up

Not fully 

I wish she would 

I need her

As much as she needs me

Belief is how we become 

How we are remembered 

By the things we do

She will not be remembered 

By much if all she does is sleep

Well, I understand it is not quite sleep

I drank a potion once too

I put my hand on her head

She likes that

It is cool 

And she is fevered

I want the best

For my friend Jae

But she will only truly be awake

If she wants the best for herself. 

On Friendship

We wait in front of

The night time window

To see our reflections 

Night time friendships

Perhaps we eat

A little bit of dinner

We don't remember

Alice has juice

It keeps her young 

We are waiting

Always waiting

For the next sublime moment

For the next potion

That will knock us out 

We toss and turn

Unable to sit still

Perhaps if we retrace our steps

We will know where our friendship

Began

But we are running out of time

Wishing for the future to come

And the past to be forgotten 

Such a terrible fright

This act of living

I wish it was a story

Me too

She replies

Except mine is more fun

Please don't leave me Alice

It feels sometimes

That our friendship has only begun. 

Sunlight and Stairs

We stand like a fawn

In the warmth of the forest

Daylight is coming

It filters through the trees

And the church windows

Alice sits at the base of an old oak

The mirror held close to her face

She is lighter than me

I am the woman in black

Who fell down the stairs

And waits for crow to

Peck her cheek

Take her breath away

Quick sticks

She suddenly says

It is like a jolt in the silence

Like kicking a book in the air

Perhaps we should load up

A jalopy

Go on an adventure

A proper adventure 

She declares

One that means we leave

The house

And the forest and church 

In our head

I am overcome by inertia 

To leave is to feel

And to feel is scary

But I will be with you she says

And nothing is scary with your best friend

The fawn chews the leaves

Watches us

The sun continues to climb

Perhaps today Little Cricket

Perhaps today

I say. 

War and Peace

For Poets and Storytellers United

We feel safe here

Wrapped up in our bunker of words

But it is a lie

The bunker is a place of war

Dangerous

Lonely

Finite 

It is no Wonderland

It is painfully real

Every second

Minute and

Hour 

A test of resolve and

Resilience

Somedays we do not want to survive

We dream of leaving

Perhaps there is some peace in that

But we remember what The Red Queen said

If you don't get it right 

In this lifetime

You will have to live it 

Again and again 

Tell me about it

Says Alice

And we both smile 

In the fading light.

A Fishing Story

There was a freak storm

Last night

We buried our feet in the sand

Huddled together

In our old woollen shawl 

Careful not to let 

The sea cut and graze our skin

Salt hurts

Like a burn 

We gasp

It is hard to hold our breath

To let the moment pass

Everything plays out 

Like an old painting 

If we can catch it

In our words

Maybe it would become a legend 

We push into each others flesh

Quietly playing out

This fishing story. 

Autumn Words

The words fall at our feet

Like autumn leaves

We know that it is not normal

But we wish to stay in the game

My throat rattles

A belly full of pills

And liquor 

Her eyes sweep over me

Checking I am breathing

I search for her eyes

In the darkness

How sweet it would be to see them

Like opening a box of delights

The longer we stay

The more I search

Time stands still

Yet moves

As slow as a tortoise 

How I wish for the Autumn fall

For the safety of words

And her soft hand upon my cheeks

Such a delicate wish

Bit one that seems hard to come by

But still I dream 

And still we are together.

Dancers

She dances

In the exit door

And a twirl 

Out of the entrance door

She giggles

It has to be my way

She proclaims

Her face milky white

Her eyes shining 

In the angles of her jaw bones

If we were brave

We would climb to the 

Top of a tower and dance

I am not afraid of falling

She declares

But I prefer 

Looking in the mirror

Under the glow of the lights

Before Wonderland

I danced in mother's clothes

She says

There were golden dresses

Painted fans 

A drum to beat

And hats to wear

I prefer a simple dress

I say

Though really I don't wear dresses 

At all

If I had to dance

It would be alone on the beach

The sand between my toes

I would dream of

Waltzing away 

On a boat

She sits down beside me

We are both out of breath

She is giddy with twirling

I am tired of falling down 

It is good to get lost in music

To move

But silence is even better

Golden she says

And we sink into each others

Shaking arms

Happy to have danced

Thankful to be still. 

Mistakes

Do we make mistakes

Or is every path a choice

She chews her fingernails 

Considers an answer

Finally she says

It is hard to tell 

In Wonderland

Sometimes it feels

As if you are stuck

When really you have moved 

A little forward

I take a deep breath

Try not to fall

Everything is spinning

Upside down

And back to front 

It feels as if the weight

Of two worlds

Lies upon my shoulders

I am so very tired

Wishing I could go back

Perhaps make different choices

The trouble is 

You only. know a mistake

After it has happened

She trills 

Happily making tea in the kitchen

I look out of the window

Limbs heavy

Head screaming 

I see the kind lady

She is in trouble too

Keep going I say

Be brave 

She replies

How simple kindness can be. 

Homework

There is dirt

In the folds of her linen 

I think she tore it

Playing in the brambles

I have been staring

At a blank sheet of paper

Worrying

The world is strange to me

It is strange to everyone

I hear her chuckle

A wonderful trilling voice

A little removed

Always close

Later we will wash 

Our clothes

It always matters

That we are clean

It is a measure of sanity 

I believe

She joins me at the sink

We will hang our clothes

Upon the window sill

Let them dry in the

Cool night air

When they are dry 

We will hang them in our closet

There is so much work to 

Do at home

We have to do it to stay alive

I hold her hand

And breathe

That is the hardest thing to want

All the only thing to need. 

Teeth

Our teeth are rotting

In our face

Too much liquor 

Too much powder

Anything to obliterate

The present

We rock ourselves 

To sleep

Hear the regrets

And the sighs of a wasted journey

The bees hum and buzz

Climb up to the window sill

We do not care

We have the curtains closed

No point looking at the sun

All is banished

All is gone 

The crack in the wall

Is agile

Tenacious 

We are bone dead still

We hope for something better

Run our tongue across our teeth

All is quiet

All is lost

Just the bangs of distant neighbours

And the echo of nightmares unfolding

We are frightened

And resigned

So many years of practice

We dare not look outside

It is full of losses

Sickness and death

I hold her hand

It is cold

I stroke her hair

Still warm

And yellow as sunset

Perhaps we will make another day

Perhaps we will be

Perhaps my teeth won't fall out

And all will be as fine as clay. 

Chess

We play chess with 

The Red Queen

She always wins of course

The board travels

Into infinity

As if he is playing 

In front of a mirror

Watching himself

Watching us

He is stuck in black and white

Like a prisoner

Reaching through the bars

We have moved

Into colour

We dream of horses

In the night

Their shadows

Trot and play on our

Plain beige walls

They are knights

She chuckles

She knows far more

About chess than me

The only game I play

Is risk 

We do not like to think

Of the Queen dying

She was part of our world

That means we always have her

Alice whispers

We can't erase memories

Good or bad

In some ways we are like prisoners too

In others we are as free 

As a pawn 

Ready to move forward

Watching ourselves 

Grow taller 

In the magic mirror

I wonder who will wear her crown

It will be preserved

Like a book of fairy tales

One moment vivid

One moment fading back 

To back and white

Just like a chessboard.

Toxic

Our love is not toxic

Not as toxic as

The patterns we use

To keep it alive

Our love is pure

Fresh as a neatly

Ironed white petticoat

We hold hands 

In the darkness

We are both scared

Waking up is so hard

Better to stay in Wonderland

Playing out our misadventures

My fingers shake

So many disappointments 

Words unspoken

Misinterpreted 

The days are both 

Long and short

We are aware of time passing

It is like grazed skin

Raw and broken

We hope one day to heal

Perhaps it is too late

Never

She whispers

As we both shiver 

We curl up back to back

On the red bed

Wait for sleep

Fear the nightmares

How wonderful it would be

To be free 

To wish for brighter things. 

Shelter

We weave a shelter

From dried grass

And moonbeams

We are far beyond

Our own galaxy

Everything spins and dances

Our head droops

So heavy with thoughts

And worries

A labyrinth of confusion

And pain 

We tie the grass

With petticoat strings

It really is quite pretty

She says

Crawling in-between the bunches

I remember the tunnels

She calls to me

I am too big to

Crawl inside

But am glad

That she is sheltered

We will play for another day

Wait for sun to fall

And moon to shine

Let the fine drops

Of rain

Pepper our skin

So tired

And yet so full of electricity

Perhaps the shelter will ground us

Make sense of the day 

The hours and the minutes

The seconds and sparks

Each breath and heart beat. 

Pulpit

We go to the pulpit

And whisper our prayers 

The stillness holds us

Like a straight-jacket

She kisses me

On the side of my face

I am not sure

If I feel it

The world is both vast

And small

The sparrows are nesting

In the spire

Silent and noisy

They are a map

To salvation

I hope my wishes 

Will make up for my

Lack of prayers

I check myself

All is silent and still

I hope I have done enough

To reach salvation

An end

And a beginning 

We do not listen

To the man in the pulpit

We have our own prayers

Longings and dreams 

We hold hands in the darkness

Scared and hopeful

What will become of us

We know

But dare not whisper

Everything has an end

How we embrace it

Is how we begin. 

Surreal

We stand on a ladder

And light the candles

They emit a warm glow

Over the fields and far away

Dinah runs up and down

The piano keys

What a din

Alice says

She is in her best dress

Holding a swan

Why a swan?

I ask

She chuckles

And answers

Just because

I am gripping onto the branches

Swaying over the river bank

A little boy blows bubbles

In the wind

He is smiling 

Happy as a fox

Sniffing bright yellow dandelions 

My face is surreal

Like an x-ray of a flower

Broken and torn 

I mourn for it

In a black dress

In the sand 

The wind blowing away the veil

I use to cover it

There is no running away from reality

Of course there is

She says

Silly

You just need to pretend.