Saturday, 7 February 2015

Hang

I hang a prayer on the board 
Loosely
Knowing it won't come true

Upside down and broken 

I am falling down a hole I cannot name
There is no sound
As we stumble tumble down
Become the people who made us

Disgusting 
Depraved
Deluded

Perhaps I am a specimen
An ant turning circles in a glass
Desperate for air
Hoping for life
Drowning in the liquor

Yes I remember now
The bath
The stars
The water
I was scared

But I am not allowed to be scared

Turn your frown upside down little clown 
Fleece over the truth and hang with Alice

I am so tired
Pretending
I could burst

I would instill my child with roses
Instead she gave me dirt

There is no rabbit 
No watch
Though time passes 
Fuck how it passes 
Thick as skin
Another wound sealing us in

I think that we are screaming 
But glass emits no sound

I fill my dreams with paper prayers
Roses and light
Pins and stitches
Nothing comes right 

I will steal the pocket watch
Reset time 
I whisper gently to her from the floor
We need to begin again.
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70 comments:

  1. humbird7 February 2015 at 09:12

    Prayer ...upside down....still can work if we given it the force of affirmation..and visualize the outcome....hard, I know...glad you will reset the time to begin again. :)x

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    1. Jae Rose8 February 2015 at 02:20

      Thank you humbird..yes they should really work whichever way you put them..thank you xo

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  2. Old Egg7 February 2015 at 12:34

    This is a very powerful piece Jae. There is so much allusion to tragedy so graphically portrayed in your words. The sadness is overwhelming and I am very impressed with the emotions you conveyed.

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    1. Jae Rose8 February 2015 at 02:22

      Thank you Old Egg..I can do emotions...when pressed...and i think i've been pressed a fair amount of late.. Thank you for appreciating the expulsion of them!

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  3. Dee Martin7 February 2015 at 14:24

    I think we both need to begin again - a billionth chance...and I give you permission (like the "mother may I" children's game) to be as scared as you want. Another children's trick - a do-over. We need one of those!! Paper prayers - I get such a beautiful visual from that, like so many white butterflies floating.

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    1. Jae Rose8 February 2015 at 02:24

      Thank you Dee..perhaps it is a bad sign when you lose fear because then all hope is truly lost...we appreciate the opportunity for a do-over too...we have spent enough time on the time out seat! And white butterflies..i shall try and hold them in my thoughts as they are so hopeful..

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  4. Bastet's Waka Library7 February 2015 at 23:38

    Wow ... breath taking ... the emotion here is so raw. A great poem.

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  5. Jae Rose8 February 2015 at 02:20

    But not a good one perhaps! Thank you kindly Marilyn

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  6. Brian Miller8 February 2015 at 04:40

    several nice emotional pings in this....the hanging of those prayers, knowing (feeling) they will go unanswered...but continuing to do so, even if futile...ther eis a need to believe in something...also he being tired of pretending...it can def wear you out...

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    1. Jae Rose8 February 2015 at 05:48

      Absolutely thank you Brian...as long as those prayers are hung perhaps she still hopes...maybe that's more honest than expecting nothing..thank you

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  7. Scarlet8 February 2015 at 05:24

    Your poems with Alice are filled with raw emotions here Jae ~ Powerful writing ~

    Grace

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  8. Wolfsrosebud8 February 2015 at 05:34

    def felt the struggle in this and emotions

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    1. Jae Rose8 February 2015 at 05:48

      Thank you Wolfsrose..yes a struggle...but at least it found words..thank you

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  9. Mary8 February 2015 at 05:50

    Sometimes we do have to reset time, I believe, and somehow find a way to begin again. Hard, but not impossible. Enjoy your Sunday, Jae!

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    1. Jae Rose8 February 2015 at 05:52

      Thank you very much Mary...we will certainly try...happy Sunday back to you xo

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  10. Gabriella8 February 2015 at 06:13

    I like the opening lines and how they create expectation and lead us to the dark corners of the poem. But I also like the glimmer of hope at the end. We can begin again more than we believe.

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    1. Jae Rose8 February 2015 at 06:48

      I hope so..and thank you for pointing out the light...thank you Gabriella

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  11. Roslyn Ross8 February 2015 at 06:45

    Poignant and powerful.

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  12. kaykuala8 February 2015 at 07:00

    I think that we are screaming
    But glass emits no sound

    One often are faced with obstacles but somehow these same obstacles can work out their own solutions. Thoughtful lines Jae!

    Hank

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  13. Unknown8 February 2015 at 08:59

    The words working through the pain and experience, I love the way this one ends.

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    1. Jae Rose8 February 2015 at 09:03

      Thank you Kim - I think the end took a few goes...with some wise words In the back of my mind... Thank you

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  14. Sherry Blue Sky8 February 2015 at 09:25

    "I am so tired pretending I could burst." I can feel that, Jae. I like the hanging of a prayer on the board, and "I fill my dreams with paper prayers, roses and light" is very beautiful. Sometimes every day is a new beginning and that is how we make it through, one day at a time. Your writing, as always, is spectacular. I hear you, my friend.

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    1. Jae Rose8 February 2015 at 10:38

      Thank you - for seeing the bright..and most of all for hearing

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  15. Susan8 February 2015 at 09:26

    Whew! Here we go. falling down and through like a loosely hung prayer. We will never become those who made us, but do what we wish they had done 9erring in the other direction). And we will listen. To the prayers. And reset time to begin again.

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    1. Jae Rose8 February 2015 at 10:39

      I do hope so...as long as we have courage we can climb out of any hole I suppose..,thank you kindly Susan

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  16. Torie8 February 2015 at 11:03

    Wow! Such a powerful write, Jae Rose. Your words sunk right into me.

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  17. Gillena Cox8 February 2015 at 12:21

    the resetting of time; surely there is enough magic in each one of us to do that

    Have a nice Sunday

    much love...

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    1. Jae Rose9 February 2015 at 05:15

      What a lovely thought...thank you Gillena...happy Monday back to you

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  18. flaubert8 February 2015 at 12:28

    Thsi is painful, yet it is glorious. You wrap it up nicely with the last two stanzas. I would like to reset time myself.

    Love,
    Pamela ox

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    1. Jae Rose9 February 2015 at 05:16

      Maybe we could share the moment when we do (over the internet waves at least)..i think we both deserve a little bit of fresh luck...thank you Pamela

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  19. ZQ8 February 2015 at 12:39

    Excellent write!
    ZQ

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  20. Anonymous8 February 2015 at 13:02

    Was here much earlier this morning, but your words brought me to a stillness of listening and I couldn't, didn't know how to respond. I believe, on some level, all of our writing is a prayer asking to be heard. The original meaning of the word used for prayer actually meant a conversation between equals and nowhere but right here on your page do I see that so clearly to be true. Each individual who has responded is reaching, hand outstretched down that hole, offering what they can. You also say that glass emits no sound. Not true. It does when it is breaking, no longer able to hold its place, purpose, or shape, but must become something else. Yes, it must begin again. And that is something we have all done and will continue to do until the last word is written and thus the last prayer flutters in the breath of circumstance. We are so lucky to have stumbled upon this place.

    Elizabeth

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    1. Jae Rose9 February 2015 at 05:19

      I feel lucky for the people we stumble amongst - thank you so much for your insight and support Elizabeth..i am never sure to publish these more difficult ones..maybe i do because i do feel safe here..and i do so appreciate all those caring and helping hands...thank you thank you xo

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    2. Anonymous9 February 2015 at 06:45

      And I thank you for reminding me what courage and honesty are all about. You, dear lady, are fantastic,

      Elizabeth

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    3. Jae Rose9 February 2015 at 06:50

      Ditto... Thank you Elizabeth

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  21. Truedessa8 February 2015 at 13:44

    "hanging prayers" but, hoping inside they will be answered. I wonder if resetting time would work or do the memories linger through the arms of time.

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    1. Jae Rose9 February 2015 at 05:20

      Resetting time alone would not change who we are I suppose...maybe it would serve no effect at all when you think about it...no wonder Rabbit's pocket watch was broken - time really has no meaning! Thank you Truedessa i think we figured something out!

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  22. Rosemary Nissen-Wade8 February 2015 at 15:45

    Powerful stuff, really gets to me. For me the scariest line was, 'Perhaps I am a specimen'.

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    1. Jae Rose9 February 2015 at 05:21

      Thank you Rosemary...yes to be reduced is not pleasant...

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  23. Donna8 February 2015 at 16:05

    I felt you falling, your prayers tumbling...such strong raw, real emotion here and yet a glimmer still there...loved the end...a powerful reminder that we can reset and start again...really great poem!

    Donna@LivingFromHappiness

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    1. Jae Rose9 February 2015 at 05:38

      I am glad you saw a glimmer...thank you Donna

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  24. C.C.8 February 2015 at 17:21

    This gave me goosebumps for so many reasons....the gorgeous writing (alliteration, allusion, Alice again!) and the depth of emotion....but mainly I am struck by the tenacity to hang onto hope, no matter how loosely, in the face of tragedy, no matter how desperate and drowning and tired one feels....this is indeed reason enough to reset time and to begin again!

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    1. Jae Rose9 February 2015 at 05:39

      Thank you for turning around the sense of desperation into tenacity to hold on - what a helpful comment...thank you CC

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  25. Cathy8 February 2015 at 18:58

    Always a pleasure to read you finely crafted words. And last stanza is just perfect.

    http://thequietone.net/2015/02/07/new-poem-part-2814/

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  26. Unknown8 February 2015 at 20:56

    Oh I so love it! I love the whole lot of commotion of emotions... And I love how it all ends...'I will steal the pocket watch Reset time-I whisper gently to her from the floor
    -We need to begin again.'

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    1. Jae Rose9 February 2015 at 05:40

      Commotion of emotions! Wonderful phrase ..thank you himani

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  27. Arathi Harihar8 February 2015 at 22:11

    beautiful poetry Jae Rose..

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  28. Magical Mystical Teacher9 February 2015 at 06:25

    I think that we are screaming
    But glass emits no sound

    These lines remind me so much of Edvard Munch's "The Scream." He used paint, and you used words, to approach the sometimes horrific nature of life.

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    1. Jae Rose9 February 2015 at 06:30

      Thank you very much Magical...the comparison made me understand...thanks!

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  29. annell49 February 2015 at 07:36

    It seems the pieces we have written for the whirl this time, are in conversation....you speak and I answer, I speak and you answer....hummmmm....that might be interesting? Love you Darling hugs, beautiful work!

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    1. Jae Rose9 February 2015 at 08:19

      Thank you Annell..that's a comforting thought....hugs back xo

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  30. Audrey Howitt aka Divalounger9 February 2015 at 09:38

    This is a wow for me--or maybe I am just there with you in the words--Fabulous piece

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  31. brudberg9 February 2015 at 10:38

    Somehow I was pulled into a bell-jar of desperation.. and I see connection between Alice and Sylvia Plath... The resetting of the clock especially powerful

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    1. Jae Rose9 February 2015 at 12:02

      Little girls with big thoughts trapped in tiny bottles which maybe they make or someone makes for them...but both trapped...yes...both books sit on my shelf and soak into what comes out...thank you Bjorn

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  32. Brother Ollie9 February 2015 at 11:02

    Your poem is bracketed by really solid lines! From prayers to beginning again.

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    1. Jae Rose9 February 2015 at 12:03

      Thank you Brother Ollie - and for the add - at least we hit some solid ground

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  33. Gen Giggles 9 February 2015 at 12:57

    Oh if only the pocket watch could be used to reset time.

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    1. Jae Rose10 February 2015 at 00:19

      It would be good wouldn't it - thank you GL

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  34. Lisa A. Williams9 February 2015 at 16:26

    Amazing! Such a captivating tale, leaves one a bit breathless.

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    1. Jae Rose10 February 2015 at 00:20

      Thank you very much Lisa - hope you caught your breath ;)

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  35. Jae Rose11 February 2015 at 02:36

    Thank you Loredana...always good to end with some light ;)

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