Wednesday, 4 February 2015

Fix

I have lost my words
They are in the fixing shop
Shot drop chop
Shop drop shot
This sickness runs through me
Like a word I cannot find or fix
The desire makes me shiver
When the clock turns twelve
And it is time
Always time
To wilt 
Like paper petals falling from a winter flower
It is funny how much devastation can be calculated into three precious hours
Once lost
Once forgotten
Just like my words in the fixing shop

This sickness runs through me
Like a word I cannot find or fix

Maybe I should make a sign
Alice does not live here anymore 
Signs don't keep me out
You know that silly bee

Signs let me in
Every shop window
Every closed door
You see the words
And the words make me

Easy peasy
Apple pie

The worst thing I burnt
Was my ticket out

Now I am 
If I am at all 
A cluster of dirty
Cherry knots

This sickness runs through me
Like a word I cannot find or fix

We will go back to the shop
Maybe there’s an answer there.


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45 comments:

  1. Susan4 February 2015 at 05:24

    Oh to be able to "go back to the shop"! "Just fix it!" I say to doctors and mothers and God. I am told that they know better. I love the idea/stanza:
    " Signs let me in
    Every shop window
    Every closed door
    You see the words
    And the words make me"

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose4 February 2015 at 06:14

      Thank you very much Susan...shops never really sell the things you need do they...maybe that's why they work so well...we look for answers in the wrong places..well some of us...other of us make wiser enquiries

      Delete
  2. Gail4 February 2015 at 06:30

    Tragically beautiful

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  3. Ann (bunnygirl)4 February 2015 at 06:31

    Lost and broken words. How true. Words do not define us, but they do help explain. I wouldn't waste much time on the burnt ticket, though. Unused tickets are always lying about, and some go to remarkable places. We just don't always recognize them because they look a little different than how we think they should.

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    1. Jae Rose4 February 2015 at 12:06

      Thank you Ann - for your wise take on things..as ever..maybe it is still around in a drawer or cupboard..more likely in my head!

      Delete
  4. Anonymous4 February 2015 at 07:20

    Now I am
    "If I am at all
    A cluster of dirty
    Cherry knots
    This sickness runs through me"... I've had a scare before but it was benign. I can image feeling exactly like your words. Powerful.

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  5. Sheilagh Lee4 February 2015 at 07:23

    not a good idea to go back to the shop though sometimes I'd like to better to move accept what we can't change and find a new reality we can be happy in.

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    1. Jae Rose4 February 2015 at 12:08

      I think that's the wisest and best route Sheilagh...always seems to be the hardest..for me at least...thank you kindly

      Delete
  6. humbird4 February 2015 at 07:59

    Maybe to save a couple positive words for 'after 12' to help to stay..and move forward, at least with little steps...they are powerful, the words, especially ones we say aloud. xx

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    1. Jae Rose4 February 2015 at 12:08

      Thank you humbird..my resolve is like jelly..but i will keep trying...thank you xo

      Delete
  7. Sherry Blue Sky4 February 2015 at 08:48

    As always your poems have the surface description, as well as a very deep underlying message, or story, like a river, carrying the reader along. I love the idea of a fixing shop for words.....and was relieved that signs wont keep Alice out. I would miss her if she were gone.

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    1. Jae Rose4 February 2015 at 12:10

      Thank you Sherry - I think i would miss her too...being slightly troublesome and ever so curious are the elements of feeling alive...i think that's what she's trying to teach me

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  8. Anonymous4 February 2015 at 09:19

    there´s always an answer...yes !

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  9. Brian Miller4 February 2015 at 10:05

    the sickness runs through me like a word I cant fix or find...that line really jumped out at me...as my dad hid his cancer from us for a long time....I hope we find an answer...as it affects so many....

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    1. Jae Rose4 February 2015 at 12:12

      Thank you Brian - as well as answers I hope there are always people to listen to how we feel as any sickness takes hold

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  10. Keith's Ramblings4 February 2015 at 10:12

    I so often lose my words - if only I had a shop to get them fixed! Delightful as ever.

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    1. Jae Rose4 February 2015 at 12:13

      I will make you a sign...thank you as ever Keith

      Delete
  11. Unknown4 February 2015 at 11:10

    I knew that you would write a desperate word feast.
    from paper flowers to burnt tickets
    well expressed

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    1. Jae Rose4 February 2015 at 12:14

      Thank you kindly Moonie...they did seem to lean that way..but maybe that's my default setting!

      Delete
  12. Old Egg4 February 2015 at 13:19

    Whether it be stars or shops they are but comfort food for our anguish. Curiously the more I hear of Alice (I can't see her of course as I am too far away) the more help she seems to be. Just keep that 'Open' sign on your door.

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    1. Jae Rose5 February 2015 at 18:04

      Thank you Old Egg - we will have a little bell on the door so it chimes when we people come in too (love the new profile pic!)

      Delete
  13. Maniparna4 February 2015 at 14:28

    A shop to fix the words...that's a nice thing.

    "This sickness runs through me
    Like a word I cannot find or fix"...what can I say... it's beautiful yet tragic... nicely done.. :-)

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose5 February 2015 at 18:05

      It would be a great thing thank you kindly Maniparna

      Delete
  14. Alice Audrey4 February 2015 at 17:30

    What are cherry knots?

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  15. Alice Audrey4 February 2015 at 17:35

    What are cherry knots? I visualize a stem but where's the cocktails?

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    1. Jae Rose5 February 2015 at 18:08

      Ah..that's where we're going wrong...I was thinking sticky knots of red licorice..or boiled sweets half eaten and stuck to our palms...now cocktails..that's far more grown up says (other) Alice...cheers!

      Delete
  16. Myrna R.4 February 2015 at 18:39

    The topic is so sad it's ironic to say this poem is beautiful. Yet, it drives home the point. it delivers the message.

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  17. Truedessa4 February 2015 at 19:56

    deeply felt words as the sickness runs through me..beautifully crafted I can feel the pain of wanting to be fixed.

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  18. Anonymous4 February 2015 at 20:51

    could you give me the address of that fixing shop? I have a few words I'd like them to work on -- that would definitely make it more easy peasy. :)

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    1. Jae Rose5 February 2015 at 18:10

      Certainly turn left at the end of the road and then look for the first sign that speaks to you...thank you Swann ;)

      Delete
  19. rallentanda4 February 2015 at 21:33

    burning the ticket out
    keeps you locked in
    who knows why out tickets are burned
    maybe out is not so good as they claim
    maybe in is not so good either
    maybe in out is much the same

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    1. Jae Rose5 February 2015 at 18:13

      Now you're in I wonderland with us Rallentanda - get out whilst you still can! At the moment an anywhere but here ticket would be good..of course we take our heads with us though...unless the Red Queen gets to them first..thank you and for picking apart that ticket..it's helpful!

      Delete
  20. annell45 February 2015 at 05:47

    This is a wonderful piece! You will find the word, perhaps you just don't recognize it?

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  21. Unknown5 February 2015 at 14:20

    This is a wonderful poem in dedication to those suffering from cancer. I wish it was as easy as walking into a shop and purchasing a medicine just like the common cold.

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    1. Jae Rose5 February 2015 at 18:15

      Thank you Kenn- a shop that fixes anything that makes life less painful would indeed be good

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  22. Gen Giggles 6 February 2015 at 04:17

    Yes, signs everywhere for instructions, rules, etc... Perhaps Alice left because of signs.

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    1. Jae Rose6 February 2015 at 06:39

      Maybe so..she didn't follow rules for sure! Thank you GL

      Delete
  23. Dee Martin6 February 2015 at 04:53

    this hits home. to lose our words, our voice...there is nothing worse.

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