Wednesday, 28 March 2012

Feel the Quality

Feel the quality she said
And I did
Deep inside her
Wiped the water over my head
And the paper
Watched the words wash away
My throat feels burnt
Even though I didn’t do it
Couldn’t do it
fuckingpatheticwelldoneyou
The man was at the train station
I bought a hot chocolate
Smiled
But not really
Left
Changed my mind
Always changing my mind
There is a blister on the roof of my mouth
I worry it
The rough edges of my tongue on the words
that need to come out
I am tidy at watching
Rubbing out the trails from my lips
Colour jostles the white wall
I imagine it as smell
The fragrance of petals
Scouring out my guts
Like bullets
And butterflies
It’s a shame really
How she’s let herself go
The wind chimes
The wet cement
The red ribbon tie
I am good at tidying
Sizing up the fabric
Picking out the remnants.
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25 comments:

  1. Ramesh Sood28 March 2012 at 03:36

    You did pick up the remnants well here, Jae...may you continue to amaze me with your writes..ever and forever.. God Bless.. RS:)

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  2. Jae Rose28 March 2012 at 04:00

    Thank you very much Ramesh..best wishes back.. :)

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  3. Mary28 March 2012 at 04:43

    Let the words come out as quickly as they come. Imagine them, smell them, taste them. Let them flow. You can size them up and tidy them up later. Have a good day, Jae!

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  4. christopher28 March 2012 at 04:43

    This is really powerful stuff, Jae.

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  5. Jae Rose28 March 2012 at 05:12

    Have a good day too Mary..thank you..for listening..

    Thank you Christopher..

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  6. Andy Sewina28 March 2012 at 05:17

    Dead good! I love the way saying 'not really' cancels out the smile!

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  7. Jae Rose28 March 2012 at 05:19

    Thanks Andy..i am good at cancelling smiles.. :)

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  8. Linda Jacobs28 March 2012 at 05:41

    I like how you come full circle in this poem. And the image of the blister and the words. You are so good at creating these!

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  9. Daydreamertoo28 March 2012 at 06:13

    Painting pictures with words that cut, wound, search for truths that don't want to be found, or, words that eventually, sooth.
    The journey continues. Your road is filled with new growth and discovery Jae.
    Beautiful, deep, emotional, YOU!

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  10. Laurie Kolp28 March 2012 at 06:37

    I can so relate to this, Jae:

    Smiled
    But not really
    Left
    Changed my mind
    Always changing my mind

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  11. Ellecee28 March 2012 at 06:45

    I enjoyed your poem very much. Your words paint the emotions so well. I like the last line "picking up the remnants" Sums it up for sure at times. Thank you.

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  12. Sheilagh Lee28 March 2012 at 08:46

    your words reach and inside show emotions that people think but rarely show. I love the last line that you are picking out the remnants.sometimes that's all we can do.

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  13. Anonymous28 March 2012 at 09:24

    so natural, you voice,writing.
    an authentic moment gathered up and branded with your seeing ink.

    i see this poem on so many levels-
    searching for fabric or love too
    afraid to water the deep draught
    of you, just accepting the remnants.

    xo

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  14. Unknown28 March 2012 at 10:27

    "didn’t do it
    Couldn’t do it
    fuckingpatheticwelldoneyou"

    Yes!
    Well done you!
    Pathetic?
    Not one whit!
    To hades with the others who think so.
    Indecision... confusion... you've captured the essence of the states. Times of transition are fraught with the two, followed by clarity and purpose. You are SO on your way, you brilliant writer, you!

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  15. Jae Rose28 March 2012 at 10:56

    Thanks Linda..i do sometimes wonder how they keep churning out..glad you enjoyed..

    Thank you DayDreamer..the road is a bit gravelly..thank YOU too..

    Thank you Laurie..it's our prerogative..

    It does..thank you Ellecee..

    Thank you Sheilagh..it would be a lot easier if we could say it as it is..at least we can here! ..

    Accepting the remnants..patch worked together..not quite right it'll do..you brought it together..thank you Paige..

    Thank you Kim..if only there were road signs..'you're doing ok'..that would be good for the soul..thank you for your personalised road sign..much appreciated..

    Jae

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  16. Alice Audrey28 March 2012 at 12:11

    You have such a way of painting images in my mind. Not just remnants, but rails and blisters. Excellent, as always.

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  17. glnroz28 March 2012 at 14:47

    keep strong,,,

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  18. Old Egg28 March 2012 at 15:09

    You have an amazing gift for pouring out this stream of consciousness that we pore over trying to find a message rather than just being amazed at such vibrant and expressive writing. You are a treasure and an inspiration.

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  19. Ben Ditty28 March 2012 at 16:09

    Never a dull moment with Jae :)

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  20. Lavonne 29 March 2012 at 07:26

    Often times the remnants are the best parts...the quirky left over parts that have the most interesting story to tell. I thoroughly enjoyed this :)

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  21. Jae Rose29 March 2012 at 10:06

    Thank you Alice..as always..

    Trying to Glenn..but am not Texas strong..

    Thank you OldEgg..a treasure in the way coal is perhaps..much appreciated..

    Too many dull moments Ben..that's when nothing becomes interesting..thank you..

    Thanks Nunee..good to see you again..

    Jae

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  22. Isha Ethera30 March 2012 at 00:45

    Yes, yes yes. :)

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  23. Jae Rose30 March 2012 at 04:39

    thanks, thanks, thanks..Isha

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  24. Medhini30 March 2012 at 23:57

    refreshing Jae, as always.... personification of colors to smell wowed me!!!!

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  25. Jae Rose31 March 2012 at 03:36

    Thanks Medhini..good to see you..

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