Wednesday, 23 February 2011

The Universal Key

The radio that makes no words hums in the bathroom.

They will come with the yellow key.
They will figure me out.

I lie on the floor holding my breath.
Squeezing my eyes shut.

I don’t exist. I don’t exist. I don’t exist.

I wish my body out of this room.
Put it upon a train.
Send it away to some place full of light and feeling.

I hear feet on the stairs.
The hollow rumble of life going on outside me.

I drown out the stress of the radio waves by grinding my teeth.

I hate that I cannot switch it off.
That I need it.
Dead batteries and no reception.

All the good people are gone.
The one’s with the juicy stories.

They left and now I can’t find myself.

I hit myself on the head with the back of my hand.

The feet get louder and are joined up with voices.
I hear a hand approaching the glass.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

Are you there?
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28 comments:

  1. Unknown23 February 2011 at 07:04

    Turmoil and pain made real for the reader.

    When I read pieces like this, I consciously send out healing energy, because I know that somewhere in the world, this is a person's reality.

    I also send the strength to hang on, to gut it out; because I also know that these moments are ultimately followed by improvement, by greater wellness.

    Writing these pieces helps. Great job, Jae

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  2. Linda Jacobs23 February 2011 at 07:12

    Wow, that first sentence just grabs the reader and the rest of the poem is just as intriguing. Hard to read, for sure, but wonderful, just the same!

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  3. Jae Rose23 February 2011 at 07:17

    Thank you Kim - writing is part of finding that 'greater wellness'..thank you

    Thanks very much Linda..

    Jae

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  4. Altonian23 February 2011 at 07:50

    Will no-one help her; will she never be free?
    Only you know, and you're not telling yet, are you. The tension is practically unbearable.

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  5. Sheilagh Lee23 February 2011 at 11:31

    Sheilagh Lee said:Wow so sad that some people really have htis as their reality. you wrote this brilliantly.

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  6. Old Egg23 February 2011 at 12:29

    Oh look! We say, Jae Rose has posted, I wonder whether it is about fun things and happiness and the joy of living?

    We are kidding ourselves of course because we are drawn in by the pain and anguish of your characters, reaching out to them to help, to sooth, even to love them back to wellness. It is all in vain though, we have got to tough it out with them on a journey with her not yet knowing how it is all going to end.

    Your writing is such a magnet Jae. Yet we the readers have hope that it will turn out alright. How can you get her to feel the same way? Are you trapped like her never able to resolve it?

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  7. rallentanda23 February 2011 at 15:00

    There are a few good ones left with juicy stories living in the sunshine. Get on down:)!

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  8. Jae Rose24 February 2011 at 05:37

    Thanks Altonian - there are some days when I know..and other when I don't..

    Thanks Sheilagh..

    A magnet that attracts and repels..thank you for always being there along the journey..and hoping that there will be a post full of fun, happiness and joy one day..

    Thanks Rallentanda - maybe living in the sun would help!

    Jae

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  9. Deborah24 February 2011 at 05:45

    Brilliantly written as always Jae, I enjoy reading your comments afterwards too ... especially oldeggs :o)

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  10. Jae Rose24 February 2011 at 06:46

    Thanks Deborah..it's nice to have a dialogue with people..Jae

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  11. Anonymous24 February 2011 at 10:38

    Writing my way through the darkness was the only thing I could do. I hear you doing the same. I respect your courage,

    Elizabeth

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  12. Grandma's Goulash24 February 2011 at 13:24

    The search for self is surely one we've all experienced. You've captured it and more. Thanks for such a touching work.

    Thanks for visiting my blog. I hope for magic as well, but most days I don't believe in it.

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  13. Jeff24 February 2011 at 14:26

    Jae,

    Powerful, painful, moving, as always.

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  14. Lilibeth24 February 2011 at 17:58

    "I wish my body out of this room. Put it upon a train." So beautifully you paint such agony for us. Will she ever come out into the sunshine?

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  15. Thom Gabrukiewicz24 February 2011 at 18:45

    week in, week out, you never fail to just blow me away. I love the richness of your words, but in such a stripped-down fashion. You seriously rock.

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  16. LeiffyV24 February 2011 at 21:10

    Great work here; the short, segmented sentences really work well. Makes me want to hide, just waiting for the moment when everything all falls apart. Another well done piece, you deserve all the praise you garner!

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  17. Jae Rose25 February 2011 at 06:54

    Thank you so Elizabeth - and for hearing..

    Thank you Grandma..there's magic everywhere..

    Thank you Nico - and for coming back!

    I hope so Lilibeth..thanks..

    Thanks Thom - good to know I can rock!

    Thanks as ever Leiffy...Maybe the time to stop hiding is when it all falls apart..

    Jae

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  18. Ann (bunnygirl)25 February 2011 at 07:20

    I like this. You write of a scary mental place with a light touch that makes it all the more chilling.

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  19. Jae Rose25 February 2011 at 07:24

    Thanks 'bunnygirl'..and love your profile photo!..Jae

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  20. Kimberly25 February 2011 at 07:39

    This was a haunting piece, but in a good way. The brevity of your lines suggest more than what's there.

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  21. annell425 February 2011 at 09:30

    Always so full of mystery. With the back of your hand? Can this be done? Sometimes there is no tuning out.

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  22. Jae Rose26 February 2011 at 04:57

    Thank you Kimberly..glad you found something good..

    Thank you Annell - do you know after I posted I slapped my forehead and realised I got that wrong (although, technically, still possible..) thanks ;)

    Jae

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  23. Jay R. Thurston26 February 2011 at 07:37

    Wow, a roller coaster of emotion for sure. Dark and troubled through the middle, but leaving a bit of hope with the reader at the end. Good one Jae!

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  24. Jae Rose26 February 2011 at 07:39

    Thanks Jay - and for following as well..Jae :)

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  25. Jane Doe26 February 2011 at 14:30

    So intense and wonderfully vivid. I was right there with ya the whole time. Phenomenal!

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  26. Dee Martin26 February 2011 at 20:04

    I don't exist. I don't exist. I don't exist.

    three little sentences that had me holding my breath along with her. Trying to shrink into a tiny spot on the floor, hoping the feet won't find me. I could feel the cold tile beneath me, hear the steps echo on the steps. and the funky cold sweat queasy stomach moment of terror when the knocks come....

    dead batteries and no reception....

    You keep us listening.

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  27. Jae Rose27 February 2011 at 01:55

    Thank you Jane..glad you were there..

    And thank you Dee..for tuning in and for being there and listening..

    Jae

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  28. Ren28 February 2011 at 16:21

    Deeply haunting.
    Well done.

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