I am sat on the train
But I am not moving
Not inside
Inside
I am going back to the beige place
The place where spilt sauce leaves me lying in the bath
Face down
Gobbling bubbles
Of emptiness
Of nothing
Nothing worth breathing for any way
I put together pieces of the place I am in
windows (which open)
kettles (which boil)
phones (which dial out)
Keys
Speedy guy walks hunched and lumbering on his walking frame
He jumped
To stop
It
That thing
That thing
I feel it too
In my head
On my face
In the supermarket aisle which no longer makes sense
In the hollow spaces of time unaccounted for
In the strange smell of home biting on my flesh.
The little girl holds the old man’s hand
He shows her the train driver’s door
He stoops
She cranes
All of this an adventure
He probably won’t see her turn ten
Turn twenty
Grow
Remember
Or forget
Maybe she will see the little girl one day
When she is sat in the wreckage of a train seat
Maybe the little girl will make her smile
Maybe the little girl will show her
That none of us have any place better to go.
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19 comments:
What fantastic feelings are expressed here as a past life is recaptured. That past is recalled but there are changes in the way she see things now. How moving were your words "He stoops, she cranes." Another brilliant piece of writing Jae.
Surreal and a little spooky. I liked the style of writing.
I love the way you show the past in this piece, the imagery is so beautiful in all your pieces.
A beautiful poem but oh so sad!
Gorgeous writing. Can I vacation in your brain?
"Maybe the little girl will make her smile
Maybe the little girl will show her
That none of us have any place better to go."
No better place to go, because all that we need is here, now. We can access it all. We can smile. We can show one another. These last three lines validate the value of a journey that has been exhausting and hard. Good write, Jae, really good write.
Now she can get off the train and move on.
I hope you're not going back to a beige place - it doesn't sound like much fun. I have those days too, though, when I wonder if there really is anyplace better for us to go.
You indeed one make wonder Jae with fantastic imagery...one sees it all happening.. thanks.. do have a look at both my posts.. ahppy poem and a haiku..
Thank you all..I like spooky and surreal...it's strange how the beige and the bland projects itself after a few lines of random words..and thank you..here and now may indeed be enough..and may even be a little better by tomorrow..thankyouthankyou..Jae
heart and soul authentically,
as always jae. sounds as if
the narrator wants the key
to her lost childhood - but in
also doesn't want to return,
to what may have started all
of this nothingness feeling
inside.
You get to the key..always..thanks Shauna..Jae
Acceptance of the past is the key to the present and also the future but, you know that already. We hold onto the known because the fear of letting go of it is too great for us to sometimes want to try. sometimes we need to accept the unacceptable Jae, to forgive the wrongs and then move on.
Yep. The more you rush, the more pointless the rushing becomes.
That was a great style; engrossing read - sad though ...
No place like home, hmm...
I'm also sinking into a slump of beige at the moment..will have to colour myself out of this one...so will you kiddo:)
I know Daydreamer..leave it on the train..get off without the weight on your back..knowing and doing however..sometimes run on conflicting timetables..thank you..
Yes indeed..Thanks Alice..
Thank you Anya..
I've got my chubby crayons ready..hope you have too Rallentanda..thank you..
Jae
Dear Jae I like this ride on the train and I like the way you write about the little girl. She will always be with you. Wonderful!
Thank you Annell..maybe she is me..a little anyway..Jae x
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