Sweet

Leave me in my sweet dark corner

It's not quick enough

Groans Alice

Grinding mistletoe with her teeth

It spills out her mouth

Bitter and green

I know

Make it quicker 

Jelly beans and apples bounce in our head

I hear them

Chink chink metal bed

The sheets bite

Pick and tear old wounds

Every nerve ending on fire

Impossible to change or heal

I roll over

All so much better

I think

Let's eat soup and glue

She squeals 

Too wired to sit still

It will make pretty music

Like a bullet clattering down our skeleton

Look I can open it with one hand

As if we haven't been doing this for thirty years 

Freckled bananas mashed in time

I give her the red ink

She writes our wish on a cheap hospital jotter 

Giggles like it’s the best gift ever

I smile

Little fingers wrapped around the pen

Have we sunk to a new low yet

She asks politely

I wait for the powder to kick in

Many times little one 

Many times

I think it’s time to leave

And presently too

We step over the rubbish 

Lie hand in hand on the floor

Is the moon rising or falling

We play with her bows

Digital blue

Electric white

We can’t keep weaving in and out

It really is quite peculiar and odd

Well look at us

Don’t we have sobriety in the bag

We look at each other and laugh 

She gives the nod 

I drop

We bathe in flowers and red the night

Stuck in our sweet dark corner.

Waste

The silver birch burns pretty 

Under the fat rain 

Drops 

Drop

Drop

The bells ring 

Heavy like clouds

A cold hand 

Brushed against our head

I sit in front of you

Whoever you are

I don't really care

Shh

Who

You

Enjoy 

Happy

New

Stop

Drop 

Roll

Why am I still here

You will paint it pretty

I will know the truth 

Better tastes bitter 

In the dark night bath

Aching sleepless sore 

With the word comes worry

And joy she trills

Jumping off the shelf

All better now

I poke my tongue out

Tie another bag

You are throwing away our holes

She pouts

I toss her some sweet sweet 

She guzzles it down

So much sweeter after the drought

She smacks her lips

Wipes her mouth

Love love she burps

I am your little handmaid

She trips skips falls over eager 

Maybe we will go bang in the night

Bump

Take a look silly

It will be a big bang

And we will explode 

Like fireworks mixed in sugar cream

She is pleased

That she has the final word

I 

Drop

Drop

Drop

Fall to the floor

In a silent kind of frenzy

Foot so tight

It curls under

So much better I think

How did I get here Alice

She is quiet

And it occurs to me

That I don't know who I am 

I sit in front of you

Whoever you are

I don't really care

You will paint it pretty

I will know the truth.

Colour

I make colour in the last remaining light

Green as holly

Red as night

Alice munches her sugar

Gasps on a tricky corner 

Angel gladly slaps her back

Brings up the dust

Do you remember last year

She asks

No 

I say

Not even stopping to pause

Days pass

Nights fall

No breaks in the loneliness

No gaps in the wall

Her fingers graze mine

She wants me

All of me

There is nothing left to share

I think

But hold her hand 

Her fingers are blue

Cold

I climb the tufts of her sleeve

Explore the bones in her wrist

She is delicate

Like a bird of bones

Memory sticks

Too wet to ignite

Let’s go out she pleads

Not yet

When

When I am ready

She sinks through the floor

Holds her head

I don’t like this

What

Being awake 

We need to be awake to open the door

She thinks

Her frown a ripple 

All at a loss

Figuring things out

So we wake up

Open the door

And leave

Well that’s easy as pie

Silly

She swings her legs 

Plays with the electric dial

As if I cannot see her

As if she is not real

I smile

Perhaps you can see in the twilight

We make colour in the last remaining light

Green as holly

Red as night.

Dawn

The white birds fall silently

In the morning dark sky

Like milk

Poured in the sweetest tea

Wake up

Wake up 

Are you there

The sheets are a jumble

For one sweet moment 

You are here

If we ever wake

There is

Nothing 

Here

But 

Me 

Same old daydream

Your voice swirling

Beating wings

She sings

Eating glue mixed with jello

At the sink

In the tarnish is

My stone face

My brick wall heart

Empty investments

Time

Money

Death 

Nothing new

She says

Maybe we will never hold each other again

Wake up

Wake up 

Are you there

Shouts Alice

Yes

Always 

My

Love

She combs her hair

Pulls her socks

Her eyes are blue

Like the sea

Like you

I let her play quietly 

In the pages

And the words

Left alone

She is resolute

Free

I do believe we will find an end

She says 

Fresh as a dawn daisy

I smile

I turned you away for a penny 

And a dream

Who would you want to see

You

Friends never made

The person I could not be

Shut your eyes

She says

Pressing a cherry stained hand to my brow 

What do you see

Nothing

Silly

When you shut your eyes

You can see anything

She goes back to her work

And sings

The white birds fall silently

In the morning dark sky

Like milk

Poured in the sweetest tea.

Bough

I wait for the call

The fall

The unbearable loss of being

Hasn’t that happened already

She whispers

Everything is cherry stained

Dirty

Sick and tired

Cherry pies and flies

There you go blooms Alice

She is wearing woodland flowers

Crash

Fall

Stall 

Brick

Wall

We have to begin again

Quick sticks

Spring through 

Thick snow

Slow breaths

Hung low

Deep sleep

Keep safe

The trees bough 

Reach my knees

So very tired

Impossible chill

Sticks like butter

Curled on the floor

In the night

I made the deal 

Years ago

Bullet proof

Skin tight

Complete

No joins

No room 

For what comes next

It connects every inch of me

To this sentence

I will never get out

No matter how hard I try

It comes out loud

She wipes my lips

Not astonished or proud

I guess that is why she is here

There is no one else to tell

Seventy years

I think

I would hope for less

She says

Past a hundred 

There is nothing much left to wander

The cold water 

Takes me to the field

The one with the silver stream

Where chocolate powder hangs from trees

And dreams go on forever

She giggles

She lies on the floor 

Holds my hand

That’s a nice thought

We say together

We wait for the call

The fall

The unbearable loss of being.

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Apologies if we can't get back to your posts and replies - we are all at sea - says Alice :~