Wednesday, 28 October 2015

Animate






















They tried to animate me you know
I didn’t like it
My skirt was pale blue 
I am sure it should have been brighter

Who wants soft edges and pastel blue
Duck eggs and magnolia
It really was quite ghastly

I look into her eyes
Placid 
Blue
Water

If you kiss me
The sun will go out

The storm brushes us 
Out
To sea
To see

Hmm 
She chews her fingers
They are still tough 
Coated in dead skin
Hell
Help
One slip of a letter makes all the difference
Or not I say

Morphing
Manic
Mayhem

The spider falls out the getting high box
Words and time replayed
I could scream for mother
But I am not quite sure what that means

We should go electric she squeals

I understand them now
Her squeals
They elevate the flat line
Turn the truth 
Nondescript to quirky
When really it hurts

Is it pain
Can emptiness and nothing be pain

Oh do shut up
Lots of people sleep with the curtains open
Who wants to be trapped in alone

I should know 
I’ve been stuck behind hundreds and thousands 
Mirrors and doors
It really does get tiresome

Not at all like cake topping 
Or bubbles and stars
They are quite delicious

Someone somewhere is having nightmares
Maybe yours haven’t even begun

Besides you are not addicted to me
You are addicted to the emptiness which made me

Your world can be alive and animated
If you choose 

I always used to be in control 
Now I can’t 

Stop
Start
Stop

Bright
Inside
Electric

I look at her closely

If I am real
Why don’t you believe in me.






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70 comments:

  1. Susan28 October 2015 at 05:53

    "Hell
    Help
    One slip of a letter makes all the difference
    Or not I say"
    Yes--both--but to put it in letters makes all the difference. These poems are hands and their images are fingers that reach out to touch others:
    "Her squeals
    They elevate the flat line"
    And that makes all the difference.
    Pow!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jae Rose28 October 2015 at 06:40

      Thank you Susan - particularly for understanding the pow!

      Delete
  2. Anonymous28 October 2015 at 06:00

    Oh the last two lines are perfect.....I see them repeated in that space behind the mirrors and doors..over and over again.

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose28 October 2015 at 06:41

      Yes - thank you for putting it so succinctly thotpurge - it's a great help

      Delete
  3. Sanaa Rizvi28 October 2015 at 07:01

    I should know
    I’ve been stuck behind hundreds and thousands
    Mirrors and doors
    It really does get tiresome

    This is one hell of a spectacular piece Jae.. I could almost picture the images depicted so intensely. Such a powerful write.

    Lots of love,
    Sanaa

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose28 October 2015 at 07:10

      Thank you very much Sanaa - much appreciated

      Delete
  4. Rosemary Nissen-Wade28 October 2015 at 07:50

    The most striking lines, to me, were, 'If you kiss me / The sun will go out' and the last two. One of your most striking poems altogether - and that's saying something!

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose28 October 2015 at 12:51

      Thank you very much Rosemary - much appreciated

      Delete
  5. Sheilagh Lee28 October 2015 at 08:29

    If I am real
    Why don’t you believe in me.

    Is a great line.
    You have to believe in yourself before anyone else believes in you but its hard to find your way to that realization.

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose28 October 2015 at 12:52

      Yes - very - and you can realise it and still not quite get there! Thank you kindly Sheilagh

      Delete
  6. Anonymous28 October 2015 at 09:31

    love this,
    animation is nice.

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose28 October 2015 at 12:53

      Yes you can't beat a good cartoon - thank you Anne

      Delete
  7. Sherry Blue Sky28 October 2015 at 10:43

    This is one of my favourites of yours, Jae Rose. I like the juxta-positioning of the words Animate and Trust at the top There are always kernels of self-awareness and inner wisdom in your poems. EG: "Hell. .l Help. One slip of a letter makes all the difference." YES! And "you are addicted to the emptiness that made me". You are moving ever closer to that open door, my friend. It is a good world - a most beautiful world - out there, really.

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose28 October 2015 at 12:56

      I do so hope Sherry - it's like one foot in cement the other itching to be free and discover what is before time runs out - thank you and as always for your shiny and bright wishes xo

      Delete
  8. Purba chakraborty28 October 2015 at 12:32

    A great read. I loved the closing lines.

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  9. Alice Audrey28 October 2015 at 13:07

    You were always in control? Really?

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose28 October 2015 at 13:08

      No - although I can be very orderly chaotic! Thank you (other) Alice - no flies on you ;)

      Delete
    2. Alice Audrey30 October 2015 at 13:33

      :)

      Delete
  10. Mary28 October 2015 at 13:22

    Strong writing here. Yes, I think emptiness and nothing can be pain. Perhaps the most hurtful pain of all!

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose28 October 2015 at 13:41

      Yes I think I agree with that too - thank you kindly Mary

      Delete
  11. Anonymous28 October 2015 at 13:39

    I would have to quote every word were I to attempt to identify a favorite.

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  12. kaykuala28 October 2015 at 14:47

    Someone somewhere is having nightmares
    Maybe yours haven’t even begun

    Funny enough Jae! One may yearn for it just to experience it

    Hank

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose29 October 2015 at 01:49

      Good point Hank - would rather sweet dreams though - thank you

      Delete
  13. Old Egg28 October 2015 at 15:12

    Alice and you are really the same person and the word morphing gave it away. But so many of us are Jekyll and Hyde aren't we? Alice gets the sugar in life but you get the emptiness and pain. This is one of your best Jae.

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose29 October 2015 at 01:50

      Thank you Old Egg - we are indeed as one although which one of us would disagree or think the other has it sweeter - now my head hurts - ow...time to lie down whilst no one is looking ;)

      Delete
  14. Myrna R.28 October 2015 at 16:53

    This is so sharp Jae. It makes my brain bleed because it brought me so close to feeling the pain of emptiness. I agree with the comment about there being too many good lines to have a favorite. It's all excellent, piercing.

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose29 October 2015 at 01:51

      Thank you very much Myrna - yes..can relate to heads feeling like they are bleeding,..it's an awfully stuck place

      Delete
  15. humbird28 October 2015 at 17:01

    Please, trust yourself, Joe. You unique, everyone unique, but not always knows/shows .
    The confidence comes from practicing every day to animate these words/worlds. Assuming that 'The sun will go out' when you show all "You are beautiful" singing Carol King "Beautiful"... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zV-5NIkKj8U

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    1. Jae Rose29 October 2015 at 01:52

      Thank you humbird - for pointing out what trust means in this context and for the song link..I will take a look...thank you for the hope and brightness

      Delete
  16. Dee Martin28 October 2015 at 19:29

    Besides you are not addicted to me
    You are addicted to the emptiness which made me

    that was a punch in the gut line.

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose29 October 2015 at 01:53

      She has a mean left hook - thank you kindly Dee

      Delete
  17. Victoria28 October 2015 at 22:29

    I am intrigued by the idea that it is emptiness that creates. And the ending is poignant "If I am real, why don't you believe in me?"

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose29 October 2015 at 01:54

      I suppose emptiness leaves holes which we try to fill - sometimes we do that well...others we don't and the hole becomes bigger maybe? Thank you Victoria

      Delete
  18. Anonymous29 October 2015 at 09:29

    the hunger for love and security is obvious,
    thanks for the poetry.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Panchali29 October 2015 at 10:12

    "I’ve been stuck behind hundreds and thousands
    Mirrors and doors
    It really does get tiresome

    Not at all like cake topping
    Or bubbles and stars
    They are quite delicious"--- ah, true that! Some people are not good at seeing where feelings can lead. Beautiful piece, Jae!

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose29 October 2015 at 13:06

      Thank you Panchali - glad you enjoyed the bubbles and stars

      Delete
  20. Merlin29 October 2015 at 11:32

    There is a lot of emotion in this poem, great job creating this epic tale Jae.

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  21. Mary29 October 2015 at 13:29

    " Someone somewhere is having nightmares
    Maybe yours haven’t even begun "

    Quite an eerie thought really....but so true. Everyone is bound to have a nightmare on occasion. Hopefully short-lived and infrequent!

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose30 October 2015 at 02:19

      That is a good hope - thank you kindly Mary

      Delete
  22. Keith's Ramblings29 October 2015 at 14:09

    'If I am real why don’t you believe in me?' How often have I heard that?


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    1. Jae Rose30 October 2015 at 02:20

      I recommend ear plugs - and a big bag of sugar - Thank you Keith

      Delete
  23. Unknown29 October 2015 at 14:23

    'If I am real why don’t you believe in me?'' How often have I said that?

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose30 October 2015 at 02:20

      I recommend never stopping talking or running out of stories - Thank you Rosey

      Delete
  24. Anonymous29 October 2015 at 14:37

    Hmm
    She chews her fingers
    They are still tough
    Coated in dead skin
    Hell
    Help
    One slip of a letter makes all the difference
    Or not I say

    Perfectly executed! and well written piece.

    I love the style of your poem and your word usage. :)

    ReplyDelete
  25. Sanaa Rizvi29 October 2015 at 14:39

    Lovely to come across this poem again :D so nice to see you at dVerse Pub.

    -Sanaa

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose30 October 2015 at 02:21

      Thank you Sanaa - and for coming back twice

      Delete
  26. brudberg29 October 2015 at 14:48

    This is such a strong piece.. in your other poem, there is a playfulness that seems to have gone, truly so much more darkness, the hell, help transition, and the way you fill those pastel colors with darkness in the beginning.. a magnificent work Jae.

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose30 October 2015 at 02:22

      Thank you Bjorn - much appreciated...yes it requires energy to be playful and that escapes me at times..

      Delete
  27. Scarlet29 October 2015 at 15:00

    Amazing write ~ I specially love this part Jae:

    Besides you are not addicted to me
    You are addicted to the emptiness which made me

    Your world can be alive and animated
    If you choose

    Grace

    ReplyDelete
  28. Gillena Cox29 October 2015 at 17:00

    Seriously, I feel like eating cake

    Enjoyed your animation tale

    Much love...

    ReplyDelete
  29. Audrey Howitt aka Divalounger29 October 2015 at 17:06

    I wonder--if we are in control, does that make us any more real? or less real? That couplet and the closing couplet are the heart of the poem for me--powerful write!

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose30 October 2015 at 02:25

      I no longer know (if I ever did at all) - it feels like 'you' can do the most unreal things at times but feel in control..and vice versa...mainly we lie down with a cold compress and try not to tackle such complexities...thank you Audrey

      Delete
  30. Bodhirose29 October 2015 at 18:54

    Really enjoyed your animated writing. Your last two lines are the all important ones. It all comes down to trust and if we can believe in each other. Sometimes it's yes, sometimes no...keeps us on our toes doesn't it.

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    1. Jae Rose30 October 2015 at 02:26

      Yes it certainly does - sometimes to the point of falling over - thank you Bodhirose

      Delete
  31. rallentanda29 October 2015 at 20:28

    I like the spider falling out of the getting high box.(grin!)

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    1. Jae Rose30 October 2015 at 02:26

      I used to..know it's a bit dusty and worn..thank you Rallentanda

      Delete
  32. vivinfrance30 October 2015 at 01:35

    This needs umpteen rea-readings to discover every nuance and layer. A formidable poem that left me gasping.

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose30 October 2015 at 02:27

      Thank you very much Viv - passing you a virtual sugary sweet...i always find that helps

      Delete
  33. Misky30 October 2015 at 03:25

    Your voice grows stronger and stronger. It's a pleasure to hear it.

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  34. Katie Mia Frederick30 October 2015 at 15:05

    Been there done it..
    i can relate to
    the emptiness
    that is pain
    greater than
    any emotional
    or physical pain
    as real.. and yes..
    out of black hole
    can come another
    Universe that attracts
    much force.. providing
    it reneWinG.. not everyone
    gets to go to hell and heaven
    in the
    same life..
    i suppose
    it is a privilege
    after a curse at least
    of
    REAL..:)

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  35. Intelliblog3 November 2015 at 22:23

    Some things cannot be animated, like some things can't be made into a musical. Your Alice definitely can't be animated... Good write.

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    Replies
    1. Jae Rose4 November 2015 at 05:03

      Thank you kindly Nicholas - I suppose she is animated (and loud) in her own special way

      Delete

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