It is control
To be the one
Holding the flesh
To be the one
Tearing the skin
Like he worried the flesh in his side
I will bear witness
To the blood
Of my being
I will hold the ink
Drip it into black
Onto paper
I should have picked up the red A
For Alice
But it is so hard to find treasure
In a head full of razors
I wrap them up in words
To stop them poking through my thoughts
But they chase me at night
scratching catching
every thing that is wrong
I should not be in the blue toilet
I should not be hanging on to my sides
I should not be waking up here
It is control
To be the one
Holding the flesh
Tearing the door open
It is control
Leaving room 23
The simplest exit left open
For the next person to die in.
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23 comments:
Jae- I love this:
But it is so hard to find treasure
In a head full of razors
I wrap them up in words
To stop them poking through my thoughts
But they chase me at night
scratching catching
every thing that is wrong
http://lkharris-kolp.blogspot.com/2012/02/wednesday-offering.html
You've hit it on the head, Jae. a majority of our issues, personal, political and social, are really about control. We seek it for our own well-being. We try to impose it on others, unwisely. We search for exits from another's... control. So much truth here, literally and symbolically.
Thank you Laurie..I feared I was walking too far on the knife's edge..I am glad you liked..it always means a lot..
Thanks Kim..exits and windows..never should have read Kafka as a teenager ..it sticks like roach trails..the door will be opening on March 1st.. ;)
Jae
I am so excited for you, Jae! So glad that the door out of room 23 will be opening in a few weeks' time! We all like to have at least a few things we can control in our lives. And I am sure that you can hardly wait to leave and make your own choices once more!
You have had us captivated for some time with those drips of ink on the paper. Those are the treasures you have entranced us with. How fitting that in the Spring the new Jae Rose will blossom. A rose without thorns.
March 1st. A date you will always remember as your own personal 'D' day. This person Jae did not die in room 23, nor hopefully will the next person who occupies it in your place. Maybe you can leave a tiny ray of hope for whomever takes it, by way of saying: 'I was here and, I survived, so can you.' I don't know, just a way of paying it forward in a small way, maybe.
Your journey will continue, and you will steer its course.
I dont't hink our minds ever stop, do they? Apart from if we sleep and even then they don't stop because, we dream.
Lovely, lovely, words once more Jae.
Thank you Mary..yes, it will be a fine day.. :)
There will always be thorns Old Egg..what else will fuel my pen! maybe they won't be in the side however..thank you..
Maybe it's about leaving part of you behind..the bit that weighed you down..maybe a shedding more than a death..thank you DayDreamer..I hope no day is without a thought or a dream..I will pass on a tidy room..if nothing else..
Thank you
Jae
Just got done reading Shauna's post and now another great poem! I'm too blessed today :-)
Control is all about leaving what isn't useful behind.
May only burdens die in room 23!
Thank you Ben..
Thank you Ann..you said exactly what I blundered around..
Jae x
Jae, have been reading you for long and always find some sadness of course it is there for some reason.. whatever it is , I am sure you will be under a happier sky from March First.. or hasn't it already started comforting you with its vast expanse of unending..love..
But it is so hard to find treasure
In a head full of razors
I wrap them up in words
To stop them poking through my thoughts
Your words are sharp like the razor. The lines above stopped me and read them over several times.
Your poetry always gives me pause to think deeper, past the obvious. Thanks for a lovely read. I hope you find the control you're searching for.
Ah, control, what a subject! Everyone wants it, but sometimes it is just out of our grasp. I think you are regaining your share of it, Jae. God bless!
Thank you Ramesh..under a happier sky..with moon and sun..
Thank you very much Denise..
Thanks Belva..fingers crossed.. ;)
Jae
Deep, powerful words again Jae. I do love how you make me think and the comments usually make me stop and reflect as well. I'm a control freak and I think Ann summed it up best 'Control is all about leaving what isn't useful behind' Keep writing. x
Um.... which Alice?
Please don't stuff me into that room.
*cowering in the corner and shivering*
Thank you dandelion girl..
Not you..Alice..I would never dream of stuffing you into the cold room..I like to come to Suzie's house..it's always warn there.. ;)
Thank You
Jae
Jae, I love the tense efficiency of your words, and the breathless downhill flow. Very serious, this. Captivating.
You're not moving in with oldegg are you?:)If you are reading his Greek epic you may wish to reconsider. There could be problems with three's a crowd.
Thanks Peter..hopefully only serious for a second..
Tsk..Rallentanda..no..moving into the same trippy head space maybe but..three plus the imaginary people in my head..now that would be a crowd..thanks for making me :)
Jae
Your words are sharp
and you cut me
Rock on!
Thank you Rex..Jae
Jae, so glad to read you after a hiatus during a Madison move to better digs.
This is vintage Jae. The big girl crying in front of the little girl (I know that one well), the razors in your mind wrapped in words... yet your words themselves are so sharp!
The final stanza was... the final stanza of her. Heartbreaking, full of meaning for me. Peace, Amy
http://sharplittlepencil.wordpress.com/2012/02/07/emotional-dyslexic/
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