Donators save lives
That is the word
The line on my stomach itches
I gave everything
But it offered no redemption
Now it hurts to eat
I crouch over the bag
Holding my sides
Even the softest fruit
Doubles me over
Makes me clutch the skin and squeeze
I need to eat
To breathe
It is like betrayal
My body
My flesh
Fending off the hazards
Stitching me to this world
All my parts are pretty
She said
My face did not move
As she cut
I did not feel pretty
I did not feel anything
Except the yellow and red
Pouring to the floor
Joining the puddle of others
It leaves us stripped
Naked
Endangered to this world
Raw as dribbling flesh
We have to do it
We have no choice
We have to donate
To save lives
That is the word
And the word is all.
This is positively apocalyptic. Terrifying. Like me, you went to the end of things with the three words. I hope it is a story and not your life, my poet friend.
ReplyDeletePowerful, Jae!
ReplyDeleteOh, wow. Great metaphor here. I read this as the way society demands so much of us. Introverts in particular have difficulty coping with all the have-tos and all the neediness out there. And sometimes it really does feel like people are taking out our organs, and the extroverts don't understand why we protest.
ReplyDeletePhew! This reminds me of people who donate their organs (kidney, lung, eye) to make money. Especially in the poorer countries where anyone with money can buy a piece of body if it's a match. Yikes, chilling write. I thought it was going to be about donating blood but, this is so much like near enough donating ones whole self.
ReplyDeleteChilling. Gripping read Jae.
This one is really powerful, Jae, begging the reader to ask "When is enough, enough?" The concept is true on both emotional and physical levels.
ReplyDeleteFor years I donated platelets at the Red Cross. The last few times the resulting scar tissue made getting into the vein difficult, resulting in a "through and through" puncture that required care and then another try. I finally stopped donating, but they still call me weekly!
Maybe I'm wrong but the donating is telling others your story, your life to help others. I think that would be the hardest donation of all.Like taking bits and pieces of yourself and giving them away.
ReplyDeleteThank you Christopher..maybe like any story an extension of reality..but thankfully am proud owner of a full set of vital organs..
ReplyDeleteThank you very much Laurie..
Thank you Ann..as ever you got to what I could never figure out clearly..yes..it does seem that the quieter you are..the less imprint you leave on the world..the more is taken..
Thank you Daydreamer..wasn't so long ago that students were paying off their debts with kidneys..now i doubt it would be enough...in many ways..
Thank you Kim..a story in itself..even blood becomes a commodity..a misplaced sales call..
That's a good view Sheilagh..perhaps the anger here was at the people who took..not the ones who received..
Brilliant as ever...yes, takers and receivers are different..can't blame receivers..for their need is the essence..
ReplyDeleteThanks Jae..you weave emotion so well.. I think even the reader feels light..
RS:)
Thank you Ramesh..very kind..
ReplyDeletea bit frightening, espec. at first when I thot it was about you! I am an registered organ donor, and I hope the events and feelings here are not part of my or my recipients experience! Had to read it 3 times, but couldn't see what Anne saw....
ReplyDeleteThis is chilling!
ReplyDeletehaunting!
ReplyDeleteThis reminds me of a movie, Never Let Me Go.
The question is how much can you give until you reach "completion." (In the movie completion = death.)
In this world there are the givers and the takers, the users and the exploited. I wonder why we always feel we are being used and in return for that we have a rubber stamp on the back of our hands for our efforts. You illustrate your work with such powerful metaphors especially this one with your innards on the floor! Turn you hand over and receive your stamp in appreciation.
ReplyDeletemakes a messiah complex come to mind - i envision someone bleeding
ReplyDeleteto save others as her own life
slips away..
some of this reminds me of the
book Unwind.
I think that there is a significant part of us that can be donated in a healthy way, like when we birth. In other ways, like when we are asked to change or remove the part of us that is not considered sane, maybe it is asking for too much. There is always a limit to consider when we offer a donation. Jae, you have proposed a very interesting question.
ReplyDeleteSacrifice of self! Very powerful!
ReplyDeletewow, my stomach aches,,,,,,otherwise speechless,,,
ReplyDeleteI was really moved by this piece. Maybe because it's captured my mood at the moment. The consent giving of yourself with no expectation for a return, but suddenly realising there is not much left of you and no-one really cares. They just expect to keep taking because you've never spoken out. I also love how the piece can be about the flesh of the body or of the fruit. Cutting and juice everywhere. Vivid, moving and good. Thank you Jae. x
ReplyDeleteThanks Joanne..maybe we see different things..thanks for re-reading too!
ReplyDeleteThanks Mama Zen..
Indeed..thanks RMP..strange coincidence as that book/film came up in conversation yesterday..
Thank you Paige+Shauna..hadn't thought of that..will check out your reading reference..
Thank you Archna..and for your insights..maybe there needs to be a limit in most things?
Thank you daydreamerdreams..
Thanks Ellecee..
Thank you Dandelion Girl..the not caring part seems to hurt the most..i feel..or not even noticing what is lost..i hope this mood is shifting..
Sorry - I missed you OldEgg..thank you..the hand stamp looks pretty..a little pink rose maybe..
ReplyDeleteThis poem was a little raw for me.
ReplyDeleteSome people are born donors and some are receivers..I think it is in their DNA..the comments are very interesting..If you are a receiver then you really need to latch on to a donor.Which means, if you are a donor you are only going to attract receivers.So how does a donor attract a donor? There is probably something in quantum physics that says the possibilites of this is about 200 billion to one. It would be good to be a receiver because that means you would always get with donors.I wonder if it feels good.It can't.. because they usually treat the donors like shit:)It would be great if all the receivers could get it together with other receivers and then they could bleed each other dry,thus ridding the planet of this scourge. I am feeling rather bitter about this topic having lost a few vital organs (metaphorically ) of late but like Prometheus mine grow back quite quickly.THIS IS THE LONGEST COMMENT I HAVE EVER WRITTEN
Donators cannot give things to others that t hey need for themselves. Each person must keep for herself what she needs. Look upon it perhaps as donating to self, as self is the most important benefactor of one's gifts.
ReplyDeleteWhat a chilling vision. It's enough to eviscerate a reader.
ReplyDeleteExcellent, as always.
Very powerful and thought provoking poem—takes atonement to its visceral limits. Am enjoying the lively discussion it has engendered.
ReplyDeleteGiving, true giving comes from the heart and it doesn’t fatigue the giver. I guess to me that serves as a good gauge for achieving balance. Some people have a great capacity for giving. Some people ask too much and seem to never be satisfied. There are limits to giving and receiving both.
I am thinking of Dick Cheney. Although he did not feel pain, he sensed “something wasn’t right with my heart”. 4 heart attacks, beta blockers, diuretics, bypass surgery, angioplasty, stents, defibrillators, pacemakers, electrical current, battery powered implants and ultimately a heart transplant. Will this new heart change anything? Or is he a living metaphor for heartless entitlement?
I am thinking of you— I know you only through your exquisite writing and your gentle and perceptive comments. Some things we don’t give away, no matter what is asked. We don’t give ourselves away. And this is hard because we want to make things right. Sometimes the requirements for atonement cannot be satisfied in the human realm. And we must find a way to make our peace with our limitations and an imperfect world.
Thank you for writing this.
Jae, didn't read the rest of the comments, but noticed quite a few long ones. I think the donation you give us each day is your own heart, bleeding onto the page. Your own soul laid bare, as if on a operating table. The fact that your "fluids" leave your body and mingle on the floor with others is a reminder of the connectedness you have with others, no matter what. I loved this. Peace, Amy
ReplyDeletehttp://sharplittlepencil.com/2012/07/27/bleed-warning-precedes-poem/
Thank you for your comment Rallentanda..I am glad you have re-grown those (metaphorical) vital organs..and I am glad to read your words..it made me think of the little magnets i had as a kid..put them one way and they'd attract..and the other they'd repel..i guess being a donor/receiver is partly an inbuilt trait..a co-operative balance is always good..but maybe hard to find?
ReplyDeleteThank you Mary...true...it is impossible to give what you do not have..
Thank..as always..Alice..
Thank you for reading Gabrielle..and for understanding..balance..and giving..inside and out takes a lot to achieve..
Thank you Amy..and for making my word puddle part of the wider world..i hadn't seen..thank you..