I am rendered speechless.
By my need to speak.
By my need to be.
By my need to exist.
By my need to say nothing.
There really is nothing left to be said.
I would pull the cord eject my body like my mind is outside of my head like the room is outside of my being like this place is not my place like these people are not like me like I want to turn in circles gather myself up in the tornado blanket clickety clicking my red shoes my red running shoes runrunrun nowhere to go no end of the rainbow stones heavy in my heart in my stomach in my head no place to find you to sit with you quiet on the old wood candle gently burning warmth of time and peace sinking into me my place is the place I never knew I had so very tired
By my need to speak
By my need to be
By my need to exist
By my will to say nothing
Like words hit my head fill my fingers punch out like a storm an impact on me that I cannot name that renders me speechless self less.
24 comments:
So often we are rendered speechless though our words yearn to be heard, to be read.
Powerful write. Love the imagery carrying one place to place in the search.
This write sparkles like shiny stones at the water's edge! I am so proud of you, your ability. And you speak of the paradoxes, the need to speak when we thought we had nothing to say, the need to be, when we didn't know, the need to say nothing, when we thought we needed to speak. Sometimes we are rendered speechless when we take a good look at ourselves. We, ourselves are a "wonder," unique, a treasure and that is you Jae.
Jae- Compelling, heartfelt piece... hang in there!
Reading this, I immediately saw the image of a caterpillar wrapping itself in a protective chrysalis, then releasing to the sometimes painful, and always uncomfortable, process of metamorphosis.
The result? That which always was... a beautiful creature with wings, now ready to fly. What bound the lovely creature actually enabled her to break free...
Love to you Jae.
(and now I think I shall take this notion and turn it into a poem!)
Thank you Reflections..Thank you Annell..and Laurie..and Kim..to you all I saw a little red butterfly on the white wall of the yard this morning and something said stay here..just for the day..Jae
Lovely impact, a poetic rendition that you have ejected here looking at "a little red butterfly on a white wall of the yard" leaves a flutter!! A wonderful sensation!!
I've given you an award here:
http://lkkolp.wordpress.com/awards/
~laurie kolp
your writing is so powerful it speaks volumes.like great poetry it makes you feel deeply.
I like the balance here both visually and emotionally. You WILL find it!
You often render me speechless. How can one comment on the sublime?
thinking of you jae
big hug
you are a very real person here =)
Gorgeous Jae, as always. I always find myself reading frantically-- and yet, your insights/ability to share and connect are very soothing.
So much need and how do you trust strangers with all of that. You are a person of words but when it comes to baring your soul there is such a risk of being judged. You took the first step. You jumped in the pool. Now what? I'm glad there is a need to be, a need to exist. That speaks of strength you may not know you have.
I don't think you can get to the peace until you take the next step. You are strong. You can do this. You are not like these people because you are going to rule those ruby slippers.
You have a lot to say and every bit of it is worth listening to.
Love the repetition here, it makes a really powerful impact on the piece.
NaiSaiKu Time
your writing, your poems are so authentic.
as if your heart takes over your pen and just
spills all that she is... love your poetry.
Hi, just to let you know I nominated you for this award:
Versatile Bloggers Award
Don't worry there is that one small voice of calm not so very far away. Your words are daggers to the heart as you describe the hurt so well. Amazing piece of writing.
This spoke to me. I understand this state of mind...
jumpstart
we all have so many needs, and having a voice I think is the strongest desire of all
May thoughts and prayers, my dear. I know I haven't had a chance to stop by and visit, I hope things are well. The write is very powerful and hits raw nerves of oppression and the attempt to break the will. I am amazed as always!
Thank you all so much..for your comments and also the awards..they land like butterflies in room 23..Jae
Jaerose, you ARE being heard. I hear you, I hear you.
You are so much stronger than you even know you are.
Thank you Thank you Mary..
Maybe so Daydreamer..but I have a soft centre..
Jae x
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